10 Things To Do While Waiting for Diablo 3 Servers to Work
You cleared your schedule. You called your boss and told her your foot had gangrene, you told your parents you were joining the Peace Corps, you told your significant other that you were all rashy and light-sensitive. You were free of obligations, fully prepared for Diablo III.
So now you’ve got all this free time on your hands, and what to do with it? We’ve compiled 10 quick suggestions to help kill the time while Blizzard figures out how to add the number of sales of a game and subtract the number of players a server can handle.
10. Actually Join the Peace Corps
Or, you know, volunteer in Africa, or even at a nearby Habitat for Humanity. How about a local soup kitchen. School bake sale? …Hell, how about just doing your own dishes in your own house? Be the change you want to see in your kitchen.
9. Reconnect with Those Closest to You
If you’ve found you’ve let some relationships atrophy with, you know, grandparents or long-lost siblings or best friends from high school or whatever, now might be the perfect time to call them up and see if they’re able to get into a Diablo III server. Er, I mean, find out about their lives. You might even find you enjoy a human connection more than an online one.
8. Take Up Yoga
That’s not a joke. Did you know that not only is yoga good for your joints and helps with weight loss and muscle tone, but that it has been shown in studies to help fight depression? Seriously — yoga will make you happier. If you can handle doing it while wracked with sobs over Diablo III, it might help make you feel better.
7. Read a Book
No, I’m not talking about a Diablo III strategy guide, either. (Book of Cain is a gray area.) I’m talking about a book that can be edifying and help you grow as a person, because seriously, you’re like an intellectual hunchback of Notre Dame right now. Our own Ross Lincoln suggests The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire. Me, I’m partial to anything written by Nicholas Sparks.
6. Learn About the Platforms of Political Candidates
Did you know that the U.S. uses a form of government known as “representational democracy” and that we regularly elect officials to carry out our political will in that government? There’s even an election coming up this year! You could use this time to do a little civic engagement and find out what those Biff Roomey and Rock Bama fellows are all about. Achievement unlocked if you vote in a local election ([seriousface] You should actually do that, it affects you more than national politics [/seriousface]).
5. Learn to Play an Instrument
Did you know it only takes about 10,000 hours of practice in order to become proficient in a new skill? Put another way, like 1/10th of the amount of time you’d spend playing Diablo III could get you playing the guitar — and maybe attracting a member of your preferred sex for, uh, hooking up. That’s what the kids call it, right?
4. Have a Party
Guess what — all of your friends are also free, because all of your friends have also been waiting most of their lives for Diablo III to come out. Since you’re all stuck sitting around, why not have a party? You could even make it Diablo-themed. After 20 minutes, shout “Error 3006!” and kick someone out at random. Or theme it after Error 37 and just leave your doors locked when everyone shows up.
3. Hunt Demons For Real
You already have all the skills, after all, and if there’s anything that popular movies and television shows have taught us, it’s that there’s a whole hidden world we’re not aware of that’s out there, lurking. You might do some real good in the world! Just make sure you’re hunting actual demons and not, you know, going crazy and chasing around innocent civilians or something. We know being parted from Diablo III can take a toll on one’s sanity.
2. Write Angry Posts on the Diablo III Official Forums
Oh, you were already doing that? Nevermind.
1. Play Max Payne 3
It’s just out there waiting for you. And it’s sad because you’re ignoring it.
What’re YOU doing when you’re not playing Diablo III? Leave your suggestions in the comments.
Follow Hornshaw on Twitter: @philhornshaw.