Blizzard Tickles Our Funny Bone for April Fool’s Day

tauren marine

The folks over at Blizzard are very amusing and today they released a batch of funnies in honor of April Fool’s Day – so don’t be fooled by the following additions to your favorite games.

First off, we have the new hero class: The Bard who after “ages spent singing of the heroic exploits of others, the bards of Azeroth are finally stepping into the spotlight on their own terms, proving once and for all that while just about anyone can pick up a sword or cast a spell, only a true hero can vanquish evil with the power of ROCK! ”

Next up we have the Diablo Pinata. Instead of being stuffed with candy it is stuffed with “fully functional replicas of iconic Diablo items and artifacts. Parents will be delighted to know that instead of the empty calories and sugar rushes yielded by typical piñatas, their kids will be getting additional exercise while they re-enact their favorite Diablo moments, such as the burning of Tristram or the slaughter of the Zakarum priesthood, all while using authentic weaponry from the game“.

Then of course we have the new “playable” class for StarCraft II, the Tauren Marine from the obscure planet of Azeroth which was “Found to harbor a dizzying selection of humans, mutants, and aliens in a state of perpetual superstition and conflict. The most physically imposing of these warrior races were the so-called ‘tauren,’ an anthropomorphic bovine genotype with super-human stamina, overpowered racial combat abilities, and bizarrely well-developed horticultural skills.”

Finally, last but certainly not least Blizzard has given us the gem that is World of Warcraft: Molten Core – coming to a console near you. According to the press release for this “must have” game of the future:

World of Warcraft: The Molten Core will include both single-player and multiplayer versions, fully loaded with nine different shapes (and possibly colors) representing the current World of Warcraft character classes. A future expansion will introduce a tenth shape, representing the death knight hero class. Blizzard also plans to include a full-featured voice-chat system, as well as a fully customizable user interface that allows players to personalize their joystick button with several different functions. A free attunement cartridge rounds out the offering, providing instant access to the complete World of Warcraft: The Molten Core entertainment experience.

Blizzard’s World of Warcraft: The Molten Core Collector’s Edition, also announced today, will include tinted cellophane TV overlays, further increasing the array of colors available to players. Additional Collector’s Edition features, as well as details on the upcoming World of Warcraft: The Molten Core beta test, will be revealed closer to release. World of Warcraft: The Molten Core will initially be available for the Atari 2600 platform, with plans for additional console systems to be announced in the near future.

Complete with concept art to the “actual” 2-bit graphics this one is the funniest of them all – complete with trailer.

Be sure and look around the internet folks, because somewhere within its bowels, some poor sap of a gaming site is going to take at least one of these seriously.

To get the full nonsensical effect of the hilarity, click here. Be sure and watch all the trailers – they are totally worth it.

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4 Comments on Blizzard Tickles Our Funny Bone for April Fool’s Day

Interweb Master

On April 1, 2008 at 11:59 am

Sorry to do this to you again Steph, but your first sentence appears to be lacking a word:
“The folks over at Blizzard very amusing” ??????

Jeff

On April 1, 2008 at 12:01 pm

Don’t forget the ‘lol’ items they added randomly in posts on the forums.

Stephany

On April 1, 2008 at 12:18 pm

:evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil:

The Blizzard site kept shutting my internet down right in the middle of posting this like 40 millions times so I had to rewrite it like a gazillion times.. so blame it on them not me.

Interweb Master

On April 1, 2008 at 12:36 pm

Ok, here goes:

Damn you Blizzard, fix your spelling and punctuation. lol.