Over 12k Sad Trolls Sign Petition to Bring Back Xbox One DRM
UPDATED: This has got to be a joke. See below.
It’s safe to say the vast majority of consumers reacted poorly to Xbox One’s byzantine trading and lending policies and its always-online requirement. We know this because, after several weeks of Microsoft petulantly pretending otherwise, the company was finally forced to completely reverse course on those policies after even the US Military rebuked them, and what was strongly rumored to be a sharp drop in pre-orders.
Of course, this decision came with a tiny trade-off: Microsoft ‘had’ to remove several of the console’s digital features from the device in order to facilitate the changes to DRM and the online requirement. For some reason, in several people acted as though this was the worst decision of all time. It wasn’t, but that didn’t stop people from gnashing their teeth and rending their garments over the fact that Xbox One’s still-completely undefined digital features have been postponed.
Yeah, I don’t get it either. But it is hilarious, and the latest entry in the genre is a Change.org petition launched earlier this week that demands Microsoft bring back the originally planned version of Xbox One. Well, kind of. Actually, it demands Microsoft release a version of Xbox One it never advertised. Here’s what the petition says:
This was to be the future of entertainment. A new wave of gaming where you could buy games digitally, then trade, share or sell those digital licenses. Essentially, it was Steam for Xbox. But consumers were uninformed, and railed against it, and it was taken away because Sony took advantage of consumers uncertainty.
We want this back. It can’t be all or nothing, there must be a compromise.
So do any of you remember Microsoft promising an Xbox One that allowed “A new wave of gaming where you could buy games digitally, then trade, share or sell those digital licenses.”? I sure don’t. Frankly, this has got to be a joke. And it appears the 12,000 or so people who’ve already signed this petition are in on it, and as a result, the comments section is absolutely hilarious.
“I love restrictions. I want always online DRM. I want the game rental business to become obsolete. I don’t want to let my friends borrow games, because fuck them. All I care about is my god damn new age console that’ll blow everything else out of the water! Fuck the PS4 and fuck those Sony guys for catering to fans who care about their gaming experience. Fuck PC, that shit is stupid. Steam? Fuck that shit. They never have sales or anything. It’s not as affordable as buying my games from the XBL marketplace. I love Microsoft and their business practices will be the best forever. Fuck yes. Xbox.”
“It’s so important so that the Xbox one is shittier again.”
“ill sign to help ps4 so we have no stupid people on the same console as me.”
“Please restrict ‘me’ and ‘my’ fellow Xbox players, we love bending over and taking it up the *** with DRM, an overpriced webcam that can spy on me and the ability to be shafted turns me on. This is why I want restrictions to come back because your visions of the future surely are what humanity strives to achieve – just as Loki said in The Avengers, we humans love to bow and be enslaved! So, why not start off with Xbox One being the leap into that direction?”
But what if it isn’t a joke? Then we are seeing one of the most beautiful delusions of all time. You can sign the petition, or better, have fun at its expense, here.