Guy Nobody’s Heard Of Claims CJ from San Andreas is Based on His Likeness
I’ve got this friend who writes for The Onion. He’s a squirrelly little guy who’s wildly insecure about pretty much everything, and I discovered one of the best ways to really get under his skin is to accuse him of being vain. This works because, even though he’s far too self-critical to be actually vain, me saying he is makes him worry that it might actually be true. There are some people in this world, though, that trick absolutely won’t work on.
There’s this fella out there named Michael “Shagg” Washington who is in some way associated with Cypress Hill. IGN calls him a “backup singer,” but whatever. He’s not actually in the group. My point, here, is that nobody knows who the f–k this guy is. The story goes that Shagg’s nephew was recently playing some San Andreas, and that’s what brought the game to to Shagg’s attention for the first time ever.
Here’s the story, as reported by IGN: Shagg decided to take a gander at this newfangled game machine thing, and what he saw was very familiar. In the game, there is a gang, and CJ can ride a bike, and both gangs and bicycles played a part in Shagg’s younger days. He also recognized CJ’s face, because, he said, it is his own from said younger days. And so Shagg got a lawyer and filed a lawsuit against Rockstar.
OK, before you get to worked up about this, there is more to this. Shagg says Rockstar consulted him in 2003 when they were making the game, and he told them all about the gang life, including how people in the gang sometimes rode bicycles. Very amusingly, when the lawyer described that situation, he used some pretty oppressive language to describe it: “After almost two hours of questioning which covered many topics of gang and street life, the meeting ended and the plaintiff was allowed to leave.” Derp.
What this all comes down to, now, is that Shagg thinks Rockstar based CJ entirely on him, and so he’s suing for, get this s–t, a quarter of all of Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas’ profits, and IGN says that means he’s looking for an award of $250 million. And this is a guy nobody’s heard of, which means we can’t even pull up a picture of him to see if he really looks like CJ. Cool.