Ocean Marketing’s Transition To Permanent Joke Is Finally Complete
It’s one thing to mess up badly, make an ass of oneself in front of one’s colleagues and lose one’s job as a result. It’s another thing entirely do so in real time, in full view of a combative and schadenfreude-loving public already predisposed to think of your job as 50% parasitism and 50% cocaine addiction.
Such is the case with Ocean Marketing who, prior to about 8 AM yesterday, were an obscure Marketing firm who handled sales for N-Control’s Avenger gaming controller. That ended when their man Paul Christoforo made national news after Penny Arcade made public an exchange between Christoforo and a bilked customer over OM’s failure to meet a promised pre-Christmas ship date. Condescending, rude, unhelpful and arrogant all at once, Christoforo managed in the space of a few hours to insult his customers, burn bridges with several leading gaming media sites and get the company fired by the controller’s developer.
Unbelievably bad for them, true, but it gets worse. Christoforo tried desperately to salvage the situation, first by threatening Penny Arcade with legal action, then with a rather insincere apology. Unfortunately, he used his family as a PR-related human shield in said apology. Cowardly and weak, sir. Alas, further digging by dedicated people across the Internet has uncovered a practice of plagiarism and astroturfing by Ocean Media, as well as some rather shady practices that appear to be conducted by N-Control themselves (though it’s far liklier that Ocean Marketing were behind that too). Oops. Both N-Control and Ocean Marketing are being widely ridiculed for the cheesy videos posted to promote the Avenger controller. Now the controller is being absolutely eviscerated on Amazon. Which means Ocean Marketing managed not only to ruin their own business, but their employer’s as well.
And yet, it gets even worse. A parody website named after one of Christoforo’s more hilarious turns-of-phrase, “The Official Wwebsite As On The Internet” now exists. Boasting that it was “Built while ye were naught but a sperm in yer daddy’s balls,” it officially aims to turn at least two of Christoforo’s hilarities into memes*. Gecko-faced insurance company Geiko soon piled in with a hilarious tweet. Adding delicious insult to self-inflicted injury, stunning proof that the Internet defies the restrictions of Relativity was provided by Youtube comedy outfit Newchallenger, who posted this video before yesterday was even half over:
Ouch. But the final nail in the Christoforo reputation coffin? Internet sleuths tracked down allegations of domestic abuse. (He says they were dropped. Out of respect for the accusing party and to avoid trivializing that serious issue, I won’t link to the records.) No wonder then that after nearly 2 days of digging himself deeper and deeper into the humiliation hole, Christoforo has wisely opted to step away from the Internet, announcing earlier today that he’s taking time off.
No, wait, that’s not entirely accurate. He actually announced that Instant Message is taking time off. Oops.
Original Penny Arcade post that started the whole shebang.
*An effort I have helpfully contributed to with the pic above. Attribution.