Rockstar Begins The GTA V Rock-Teasing In Earnest

Well well well. It looks like we might have been punked yesterday during Take-Two’s Q2 investor call. Despite a growing rumor to the contrary, the company expressly kiboshed any talk of the release date for Grand Theft Auto V, going so far as to say at one point that “We just haven’t talked about a release date”. The obvious conclusion is that GTA V isn’t close enough to completion for a holiday, 2012 release, and that we ought to prepare for March, 2013, just as some have predicted.

And yet, Take-Two still carved out that huge hole in their Holiday release schedule; literally no significant games are confirmed for release between October 9th and February 26. Absent a GTA V release, that’s the dumbest possible decision. Could it be they really did just decide to disarm over the holiday season? Probably not, because Rockstar just launched the first GTA V viral marketing. Dicks.

The Episilon site, and the official Epsilon twitter feed both went live this morning. If you played San Andreas – and at least 20 million of you did – then you’ll remember Epsilon as the Scientology parody religion that heavily advertised on WCTR. The character Maccer was an adherent, and random civilians often urged you to join. The website is full of hilarious ‘facts’ of the kind people tend to believe when they accept junk philosophy. The Twitter feed is nothing but platitudes. Awesome.

After a decidedly bleak GTA IV universe (even if Republican Space Rangers was nearly perfect), it looks like we’re getting return to the kind of spot on goofiness that made San Andreas such a fun place to play in. I realize that the current GTA continuity has no connection to the GTA III era, but I’m hoping this won’t be the only thing from San Andreas to make it into the game. More importantly, it also suggests that we’re closer to release than Take-Two let on. Well played. Dicks.

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