The 5 Worst Star Wars Games Ever


With Star Wars: The Old Republic looming over us like a rancor with its mouth open, my editors have seen fit to ask me, Game Front’s resident recovering Star Wars addict, to make a list of five terrible Star Wars games. And so it is with great regret that I do something that I never like to do: dig into my past and turn some good memories into bad ones by pointing out how things I once enjoyed are actually horrible. YOU’RE WELCOME.

Note: I played every game on this list obsessively at one point or another.

5. Super Star Wars


I know the nostalgic asshole in all of us likes our games hard, but come on, man. I had the chance to revisit this one at the Star Wars Celebration VI convention in 2007, and my god it was a painful experience. I couldn’t go ten steps without getting brutally murdered. It was not even remotely fun to play the first five minutes over and over again until I finally conceded defeat.

4. Force Commander


In addition to being obsessed with Star Wars when I was growing up, I also had quite the fetish for Command & Conquer. So I was naturally quite enthusiastic for the first ever ground-based Star Wars real-time strategy game. Little did I know that I would spend hundreds of hours of my life playing the most clumsy and technically flawed strategy game I would ever touch. I thought I just needed a better computer; it turns out the game was just poorly made.

3. The Phantom Menace


Like every good little 11-year old, I was totally into The Phantom Menace. And, of course, I was into the game based on it despite the fact that it was totally the most awkward Star Wars game ever made, nevermind Jedi Power Battles. Yeah, it had combat that was basically broken, but I didn’t give a damn because I had f–king cheat codes.

On the plus side, this game did let you murder children.

2. Masters of Teras Kasi


This was one of the first games I got for the original PlayStation, and boy do I now regret this being my fighting game of choice for so long. I mean, it was Star Wars. But that doesn’t excuse it also being the worst fighter this side of Shaq Fu. You know how good fighting games have balance? Yeah, the folks who made this game had never heard of that. Also, it’s stupid to make a Star Wars game that doesn’t even remotely fit within the canon. They actually made up characters for this game, including a sand person named Hoar, which is ridiculous considering there are literally millions to choose from. Also, Mara Jade fighting with a lightsaber during the Original Trilogy era? Yeah right. God, I’m such a loser.

1. Rebel Assault


This was basically a light gun game in which you had to use a joystick instead of a light gun, and it’s exactly as lame as that sounds. Well, sometimes you get to sort of fly things, and that’s not fun either. This game is even a worse offender of the canon than Masters of Teras Kasi, because it gives somebody named Rookie One credit for blowing up the Death Star, and it put the Battle of Hoth before that first Death Star battle. The sequel was an improvement only because it had full-motion video cutscenes.

Follow Phil on Twitter: @philrowen

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13 Comments on The 5 Worst Star Wars Games Ever

l

On December 8, 2011 at 4:37 am

rebel assult was a great game munch

user

On December 8, 2011 at 6:21 am

Rebel assault IS a great game. So is RAII. Anyone who says otherwise is Sith scum!

Garyn Dakari

On December 8, 2011 at 2:15 pm

Lol, the Phantom Menace was my favorite game when I was younger…Haven’t played it in the last 5 years or so though.

raptr1244

On December 8, 2011 at 2:55 pm

Phantom Menace, Force Commander and Rebel Assualt were great games!!! Dont know what you are on about.

Phil Hornshaw

On December 8, 2011 at 2:59 pm

Wow, obviously you guys are remembering games a little differently than I am.

Although I do have a special place in my heart for Super Star Wars, even if it is painfully, stupidly hard.

Darthbob

On December 8, 2011 at 3:01 pm

It’s a good thing the list stops at 5…Force Unleashed II would certainly be close by…

wobbles

On December 8, 2011 at 5:05 pm

Super Star Wars??!!

You are joking right?! Just because a games hard doesn’t make it bad. I was like 8 when I got that game for christmas and it didn’t take me long finishing it. Games where different back then. You built up crazy fast reactions without knowing it. Just like old school arcade machines. To play them games properly again you need to be playing them like they are the only and most advanced games you own, like it was back in the day. It’s impossible with the futuristic games out now :)
I’m pretty sure Super Star Wars wasn’t as hard as this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXUKfh9nXvI

Finishing that game was brutal but totally amazing! I tried playing it a short while ago and and got my ass handed to me. I think finishing the end Level of UN Squadron was short of insanity but it was the best feeling I’ve got from a game yet, followed closely by street fighter II! Beating a hard end level boss or finishing a hard game is far better than any leveling up that happens these days.

Skill! I miss it!!

bernie

On December 9, 2011 at 12:03 am

what the forck does this nincompoop know. he’s probably not even a sperm in his dada’s testicle when r.a. was released.

Cesar

On December 9, 2011 at 1:09 am

Hey Phil Owen, please die!

Phil Owen

On December 9, 2011 at 1:59 am

Thanks, guys!

Lucas

On December 9, 2011 at 1:54 pm

Each to their own but for at least a few of these games they were excellent at the time. And I agree with Super Star Wars, game was brilliant. All entitled to our own opinions of course.
Please don’t die Phil…

Alex

On December 11, 2011 at 2:29 pm

I completly disagree with this list :( and i really liked star wars the phantom menace one of the first games i fell in love with as a child …..

Pretzelman718

On January 2, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Cool! It’s nice to have my video shared. Phantom Menace was truly a menace of a game. xD