The Funniest Steam Tags So Far

With the launch of Steam’s new tagging system yesterday, Internet comedians everywhere have taken to the service to add hilarious tags to their favorite games.

We’ve assembled a list of some of our favorites so far, but we want your help to find the funniest tags on Steam. Check out our favorites, and drop your finds in the comments!

Farming Simulator 2013:

  • Capitalism, Ho!

Alpha Protocol:

  • Beard Simulator

Duke Nukem Forever:

  • Functioning toilet
  • All outta gum
  • Balls of Fail

Sword & Sworcery:

  • Hipster Garbage

Payday 2:

  • Bag Throwing Simulator

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2:

  • DOOM Clone
  • CoD-Like
  • Pew Pew Pew
  • Losing Simulator

Call of Duty: Ghosts:

  • Fish AI
  • Collar Duty
  • So not tactical
  • DOOM Clone

Dark Matter:

  • Functioning toilet
  • No disc

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim:

  • Spiders

The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion:

  • Horse armour
  • Not Morrowind
  • Patric Steward (sic)

Infestation: Survivor Stories (The WarZ):

  • Scam
  • Never buy
  • Fake
  • Overpriced

7 Days to Die:

  • Unfinished

  • Maybe is Half-Life 3
  • Cancerous

Line of Defense Tactics:

  • Overpriced Port of a Mobile Game
  • Derek Smart’s Desktop Commander
  • Games to Play When You Are a Clown in a Circus and Need a New Routine
  • That price tho

Euro Truck Simulator 2:

  • High impact sexual violence

Dark Fall: Lost Souls:

  • Not Dark Souls
  • Used Condom Trading Card


  • Half life 3 confirmed
  • My Life was ruined because of this
  • Not Psychonauts 2
  • Not Alan Wake 2

Angry Birds Space:

  • High impact sexual violence
  • Skyrim With Birds
  • Git Gud or Die Tryin’
  • Battletoads

Stanley Parable:

  • Walking Simulator
  • Simulation Simulator

Total War Rome II:

  • Rome wasn’t patched in a day

Papers Please:

  • Bureaucracy ‘em up
  • Flappy Bird with papers


  • Spreadsheet Simulator

Found other tags in Valve’s burgeoning Steam Tags beta? Share them in the comments below!

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4 Comments on The Funniest Steam Tags So Far


On February 13, 2014 at 3:55 pm

what a useless ty feature if u ask me. giving names to a game, good way to end up with a huge list of ty names…

T. Jetfuel

On February 14, 2014 at 5:51 am

I’ve been reading the Interweb commentary on this silly feature, and it seems that in some quarters the insolence of gamers in their tagging of these products is causing a considerable amount of harrumphing over canapes and Port wine. Unlike the Royal Game Culture Improvement Society of Upper Squireshire though, I personally applaud the Steam community in their principled pushback against this attempt at “crowdsourcing” the curation of the Steam inventory. I mean, what’s next? Making the customers stack the shelves at the grocery store? If Valve wants to sell the games, surely it’s not that unreasonable to expect them to organize them in a manner that allows the customer to find the kind of things they are looking for?

And who exactly is this feature supposed to cater for? I keep seeing examples like Skyrim tagged as “mod-friendly”. Sure. But are there a lot of people who go are interested in mod culture who lack this kind of information? “I say, I am fascinated with user-generated RPG content… if only there was some way to search for this information in a massive database of some kind.” The same goes for “Rogue-like”, “procedurally generated perma-death dungeon” and so on. This is deep gamer stuff, and it’s not going to help Nicholas Noob find the perfect intro to gaming. So the entire feature becomes a war of “GOTY right here!” vs. “Worst Gaem evah” for the kinds of popular titles that inspire these polarities. Call me a fool, but I don’t see how that’s going to be anything but a distraction. There are actual user reviews, ones that even show how many hours the user has logged on the game they are reviewing.

So… Good job, Steam community. And extra points for the “Beard Simulator” tag for Alpha Protocol.


On February 14, 2014 at 9:32 am


Soviet Union
Better than League

Red Menace

On February 15, 2014 at 2:31 pm

Did not a single person at Valve see how prone to abuse this was? Anyway, probably the worst new feature yet. A feature I won’t use because it simply seems to make existing features I don’t use easier to navigate. “Here are some games you might like, because they’re on your wishlist.” Wow Steam, great work!