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Blistex

Been here longer than you!

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21st May 2003

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#1 15 years ago

Last night I'm playing axis on the Gamespy server, about 40 people in the server, and strangely enough the team balance stayed 50:50 with 20 people on each side.

Bocage: 1st time the server playes it.

Axis never get over the bridge, allies stay put on the island in the centre. Allied air power completely rapes the axis side's tanks. Whenever a German tank does make it across the bridge the 105mm howitzer gets it.

The real problem is that the axis have no drive, when they do get tanks they just stay on the hill above the river and snipe troops and tanks, but never try and cross it. After a 15-20 minute game of complete boringness the axis are defeated and the map starts up again.

Bocage: 2nd time the server plays it.

After 2 minutes it becomes obvious to me that the exact same scenario is going to happen again. I figure that drastic times call for drastic actions! I camp at our base as an engineer until the Panzer IV with the armour skirts appears and take off along the really long and indirect northern route that least across the 2 bridges and ends up behind the allied base. Luckily I manage to get there without being spotted by allied air power (that MG-42 on the commander's cupola isn't very effective at keeping P-47's and P-38's away). I finally come to a stop on the bridge just metres away from the allied airfield and begin my plan of destroying their equipment before it can get to the front. As soon as my forces manage to get across the first bridge and secure the island I will speed to the next spawn point and capture it.

After 5 minutes of destroying those 2 tanks in the allied main base and keeping all their aircraft grounded nothing happened! Those morons playing axis wern't even able to get across the first freaking bridge! They were just happy to sit and snipe at troops! After another 2 minutes of camping I speed around the base so that I can attack the tanks in the main base, shoot their planes on the runway, attack the 105mm Howitser by the sawmill, and destroy the spawning Sherman at the bridge with the AA gun as well.

I, all by myself (not gloating) was keeping 3 tanks and the 105mm Howitzer out of operation, plus all their aircraft from leaving the ground. And guess what happened.

Nothing! My forces, minus 1 tank, without any airpower against them still didn't bother to cross the first bridge!

Well after another minute one of the Alied tanks managed to escape my attention and killed me. It took all the willpower I could muster to not expack my entire team for being a bunch of retards! Needless to say the axis lost again!

Anyone else have a similar story of stupid teammates that almost drove them to murder? :furious:




Tommek

I hate arcade!

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13th October 2003

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#2 15 years ago

Berlin Outskirts... russian side.

A Tank spawns, an ivan hops in an drive to the front... BOOM... the 88 does her job. Every Tank drives one after the other over the hill to make the guy on that 88 happy.




PanzerAce

Some Guy...

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11th January 2004

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#3 15 years ago

well, the whole crete thing of "WHERES MY %)#* CHUTE?!?!?!?!" is pretty funny. and then they take the same class agian, and again.




Murock

Ski and Surf All Day!!

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31st January 2004

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#4 15 years ago

Blistex play WAW then you will have teammates :cheers:




Blistex

Been here longer than you!

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21st May 2003

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#5 15 years ago

I'll have to try that server, my ASE says it's got a ping of 318 but my "ping 205.177.13.153" command says 58-200.

Thanks for the heads up!




Ohioan

Not Wise Shitashi - Cheston

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6th October 2003

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#6 15 years ago

Blistex Bocage: 1st time the server playes it.

Axis never get over the bridge, allies stay put on the island in the centre. Allied air power completely rapes the axis side's tanks. Whenever a German tank does make it across the bridge the 105mm howitzer gets it.

The real problem is that the axis have no drive, when they do get tanks they just stay on the hill above the river and snipe troops and tanks, but never try and cross it. After a 15-20 minute game of complete boringness the axis are defeated and the map starts up again.

That was me in the P47D :) It's real easy to get ownage on that map with a bomber. I don't care much for the P38, the rockets dont hit the crosshair.

My tale of stupidity was today on BotB. The KT rushed out of the base unescorted, passed by the small outpost flag by the bridge, and goes straight into the town with the church. I hit it in the side with an M10 round as it was going over the bridge, and it didn't seem to know where I was. I go up the hill with the inention of getting a few more shots at it, since the M10 was about the only good weapon the allies have against it.

(sidenote: I hit the KT with 4 105mm Howitzer rounds from the stationary guns. That's ridiculous, as one would have destroyed it. Not to mention I hit it from ABOVE since the shells were arcing down onto it. This is a bug)

I get behind it, hit it two more times, and I see some smoke. Then, a bunch of infantry on my team (most of whom have Tommys or BARS) get right up next to it on the ground and follow it around while trying to stay out of view of the turret. I held off my fire and was typing to tell them to get the hell off of the KT when it started rotating my direction. I fired, destroyed it, and got 2 tks from the morons that were playing grabass with it. That's stupid. If you hump enemy vehicles then you should expect to get blown up when the vehicle gets blown up. Especially a high-priority target like the KT. The Howitzers at our base wanted to shoot at it but werent because of the idiots around it. :fistpunch:




bombardier

Uncultured Swine

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21st October 2003

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#7 15 years ago

Crete:

After waiting about 3 minutes for the ju52 to load up with about 20 players, some tard drops a grenade inside. An eerie silence of people staring at the grenade soon hushed over the paratroopers.




McGibs

FHdev

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3rd October 2003

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#8 15 years ago

I was hunting a tiger with a bazooka for 5 min, until it finally stops by a town. I run up to it, jump onto the tracks, and just as I'm about to leap onto the back and turn the thing into a flaming black box, some dumbass in a sherman comes around the corner and shoots the tiger in the front. I go flying 50 feet in the air and die. The tiger promply disposes of the sherman.




Blistex

Been here longer than you!

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21st May 2003

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#9 15 years ago

'[CNIOhioan']That was me in the P47D :) It's real easy to get ownage on that map with a bomber. I don't care much for the P38, the rockets dont hit the crosshair.

Did you notice during the second round of Bocage that your P-47 started taking MG damage? I was about 2km away from your base when I saw you flying above me.

I was sure you were going to do a lazy turn and smoke me with a few bombs, thus putting an end to the 5 minutes of cautious driving I had just undertook!




McGibs

FHdev

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3rd October 2003

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#10 15 years ago

actually, an all to common event happend today on crete.

30 german paratroopers, all loaded into a JU82 (you can see where this is going...) wer're about to take off, when little "cold-cruel_world" decides to "acedentally" drop a grenade.

It was like one of those slow motion events... Nade hits floor. Everone on the plane hears nade hitting floor... nade slooooooowlllly rolls to the back of the plane, where it sits, slowly rotating for those last few seconds of it's short life.

The killcam was quite funny though. it zooms out to birds eye view, where you see a huge cloud of german corpses come flying out from the rear of the JU82, then all land at the same time. A large mountain of para kits littering the runway.