Is our friendly neighborhood Space Marine a Special Olympian? -1 reply

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Merovign

I'm too cool to Post

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5th August 2004

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#1 15 years ago

Hear me out here (I'll do my best to avoid spoilers): Many have posted concerning some apparent discrepancies in the game that are difficult to explain. The Marine's behavior seems to be contradictory, even foolish at times. I believe I have explained these issues. Our Marine is a bit of a Forrest Gump. Rides the small bus, if you know what I mean. Shocked? I think I can prove it: 1. He never speaks. If he did, it would be obvious immediately that he suffers from a congenital developmental disorder. 2. The flashlight. Anyone with an IQ > room temperature would not, while crawling about in dark spaces, hit things with their one and only flashlight. 3. The flashlight again. Normal people would either use a Harries carry or duct-tape the flashlight to their helmet, shoulder pad, belt, John Thomas, or whatever. Our marine has not figured this out. 4. In cutscenes, or hero frequently either stands dumbfounded as a monster eats someone in front of him, or, hearing horrible noises, walks calmly into the open and looks around, oblivious to danger. 5. Oxygen. Many theories have been put forward regarding our hero's 40-second trips into the Martian wilderness. Seeing as he doesn't actually have an environment suit, the only possible explanation would seem to be that he is holding his breath. But he is clearly breathing. So what is the explanation? Our hero is too dumb to tell when he should and shouldn't breathe, and he is trying to breathe the martian atmosphere. He probably can't swim either. 6. Mars has 60% of Earth's gravity. Our hero has just come from Earth to Mars. And yet he can only jump two feet into the air, can't climb objects, and can't jump forward more than 5 to 6 feet. Why do you think they have a seperate Olympics? 7. Running. Our hero can't run very far without becoming too tired to go on. A Marine? A Special Marine, meeting the Special requirements of the Special Marine Corps. 8. Why is our hero the only one who is never posessed by demons? When they attempt to strike a bargain for his soul, he doesn't understand. Notice how everyone else who isn't posessed only use short sentences and keep repeating themselves. 9. Short-sleeved armor on an alien planet. Special Marine Corps. 10. Clomps his feet, even when walking slowly. This theory would also explain why there are no secondary fire modes. There are, but he can't figure them out. Tell me what you think. - Merovign - VSMC (Very Special Marine Corps) *disclaimer* I have a great deal of sympathy for people with real developmental disabilities, and admire the persistance of courage of those who know they are abnormally slow and try to lead a happy and productive life. On the other hand, self-taught retards, born normal but too lazy to think, are an object of my everyday scorn.




Moto42

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6th August 2004

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#2 15 years ago

Looking at Doom one and two, do you really think their going to send the cream of the armed forces crop into that? Alone? Equiping them with just a pistol and anything they can scrounge up? Of course not. If you ask me, it was a tactic for getting rid of "damaged" soldiers they couldn't legaly fire. The same holds for the first mission that the marine in Doom Three is sent on. "Aw Cr*p they've dumped an idiot new recruit on us... hmm maybe he'll get lost and die of hunger or something if I send him to the other side of the facilty to "find a scientist"." *The same disclaimer as in the above post goes for me as well.




succorso

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6th September 2003

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#3 15 years ago

:lol: thats funny sh*t guys

Awesome




grishank

The Internet ends at GF

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6th August 2004

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#4 15 years ago

I havent played the game but I have noticed a big mistake. Mars has an atmosphere which exerts very little atmospheric pressure (200 times less than that of the earth). If you were to walk outside without a space suit you would explode. QUICKLY. I can just imagine the view from above watching the zombies wandering around outside and popping like water ballons........invasion cancelled, back to hell we go boys..... And here comes our marine without a space suit....POOF!




CHAKA VIP Member

Anti-antidisestablishmentarian

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15th January 2004

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#5 15 years ago

It's a game full of trans-dimensional portals, the walking dead, and big nasty wossnames from the arse end of hell. and you have a problem withthe AIR PRESSURE???

I want you to think about what's wrong with that.




grishank

The Internet ends at GF

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6th August 2004

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#6 15 years ago

Yeah.....but the people from the arse end of hell all just popped. So they aren't the problem any more...... Hehe..HOORAY for pedantry!




Boss

Russian that lives in Canada

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14th December 2003

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#7 15 years ago

i hate how the asshole marine isnt eevr talking.. i remember there was a revenant in a movie and he shot a rocket.. and the marine didnt run away he just stood there..




CyberRaptor

Jinxed

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5th August 2004

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#8 15 years ago
He never speaks.

Gordon Freeman never speaks in Half-Life, and he has a Ph. D in theoretical physics. You are assumed to BE that character.

Anyone with an IQ > room temperature would not, while crawling about in dark spaces, hit things with their one and only flashlight.

That flashlight could be made from a particularily strong alloy or some other metal substance from the future.

The flashlight again. Normal people would either use a Harries carry or duct-tape the flashlight to their helmet, shoulder pad, belt, John Thomas, or whatever.

Where would he get duct tape?

In cutscenes, or hero frequently either stands dumbfounded as a monster eats someone in front of him, or, hearing horrible noises, walks calmly into the open and looks around, oblivious to danger.

Maybe he remains calm because he knows he is tough and well armed. And he doesn't appear oblivious of anything to me. In one cutscene, he dodges out of the way when some rocks fall near him.

Oxygen. Many theories have been put forward regarding our hero's 40-second trips into the Martian wilderness. Seeing as he doesn't actually have an environment suit, the only possible explanation would seem to be that he is holding his breath. But he is clearly breathing. So what is the explanation? Our hero is too dumb to tell when he should and shouldn't breathe, and he is trying to breathe the martian atmosphere. He probably can't swim either.

You know those oxygen tanks he picks up outside? He obviously starts out with one and uses it as the situation demands. He is clearly using a special breathing apparatus.

Mars has 60% of Earth's gravity. Our hero has just come from Earth to Mars. And yet he can only jump two feet into the air, can't climb objects, and can't jump forward more than 5 to 6 feet.

Can't explain that...:confused:

Our hero can't run very far without becoming too tired to go on.

Maybe that's because he is wearing full body armor, and carrying multiple heavy weapons!

Why is our hero the only one who is never posessed by demons?

He's not the only one. What about Bravo team? Not everyone was possessed.

Short-sleeved armor on an alien planet.

That's not his fault! Maybe that's all that was issued to him. Budget cuts?

Clomps his feet, even when walking slowly.

Again, he is carrying multiple weapons and is in full body armor. That makes it pretty hard to be stealthy.

Tell me what you think.

What I think is that I'm sick and tired of people nitpicking this game. It's a shooter for gods sake. Can't you take anything at face value?




Ultima2x

Addicted to GF

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27th June 2004

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#9 15 years ago

Gordon freeman speaks in Half-life, just now Half-life2 (or so they say)




Swainy

Dread thinks I'm a special person

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10th April 2004

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#10 15 years ago
Moto42Looking at Doom one and two, do you really think their going to send the cream of the armed forces crop into that? Alone? Equiping them with just a pistol and anything they can scrounge up?

If you read the DooM manual, the prologue says that a special team of marines, heavily armed, are sent to the UAC facility on mars to find out whats going on after they lose contact. Taggart(DooMGuy) has been ordered to patrol the LZ, he hears thier screams over the radio and enters the facility, armed only with a pistol, to find out whats happened.