The following communique was sent to Red Menace in response to his overture to a ceasefire:
[From jumjum, on behalf of the sovereign forum of Forgotten Hope]
I propose a status pro ante bellum: a return to conditions as they existed before these hostilities so mysteriously broke out. [INDENT]1. All boundaries to remain intact. 2. Safe passage guaranteed by citizens of either forum into territory of the other, and no necessity for a passport to be used for future entry into either. 3. As to the "small dowry" of gold and silver, FH will undertake to return to Spam only such items as FH took from Spam in the first place. 4. FH will also return all the Spam women earlier taken. Inasmuch as FH employs a "super-wide gauge" standard, the women appear to be in need of complete overhaul, to include emergency re-bushing. Otherwise I am afraid the standard-gauge employed by Spam will find tolerances varying so widely as to make failure certain. Are we in accord? Can we announce a cessation of hostilities and go once more as brothers into the brave new world?
Red MenaceWe have marched on your capital and brought our demands to your doorstep. We feel we have made our point...and some of us have better things to do. With that being said, we shall state our terms. We deem them fair, a token of friendship to our beleaguered foes. Our terms are as follows:[/INDENT]
- An immediate end of hostilities on both sides.
- The creation of a demilitarized zone.
- The allowing of some access to our forum and vise versa.
- A small dowry of gold, jewels, milk and butter.
- And if war is to commence against us both again then formal declarations of war will be made.
I'd say yes because I want to post a thread, but it is actually legit, and not spam.
I recommened a proviso outlawing the future use of the "Tabbed Browing Number Posting Cluster Shell" as it has caused much undue suffering for little legitmate military gain.
7th December 2003
Under terms previously declared this ceasefire is now binding. Cease all hostilities and resume your normal posting-activities please.
edit: Reconstruction work is done, everything posted during the attack is now either in the Spam-forum (if it was a new thread) or deleted (if it was an addition to an existing thread).
I'll leave this thread open for feedback. Thanks to Seinfield and Red Menace for organizing the attack and to all FHers for hosting this event.
Heresy! We Must Fight On! Deus lo vult!
High relevance bump. Anyway, my head is killing me. I'm going to the medic. JohnWalker, you have the helm.
Snipes With Artillery
22nd March 2005
I can't believe he left out the demand for salt. We must have our preservatives!