How does CLINICAL anxiety work? 13 replies

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Lysdestic VIP Member

Dr. Professor Logic, PhD.

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#11 2 months ago
Posted by random_soldier1337
Posted by Lysdestic
Posted by random_soldier1337

I see. Well my circumstances, my rules. I give a hand only to have it my arm torn off, nearly most of the times.


So did you want help understanding anxiety disorders or validation for judging an acquaintance?

The first. I just find your sentimentality misplaced given you don't know anything my situation and my interactions.


You're right, I don't know anything about your situation or interactions, but the impression that I'm getting is that you don't know much of the real substance behind this persons background either. They're chatty. Have a lot of friends. These things do not preclude an anxiety disorder.

You seem to think that a lack of a clinical diagnosis in some people is somehow a detriment to those that suffer, but as a survivor of mental illness, I take your words as much more of an affront than those of anyone falsely claiming to have a disorder. I'd much prefer to err on the side of caution when such a claim is made. The thing I'm at a loss trying to figure out is how pontificating about whether or not someone actually does have a condition without any understanding of their medical or personal background isn't a detriment in it's own right?

That just doesn't add up, man. Opinions like that are why so many people still choose to suffer silently from their mental illness. We still live in a society where people feel that they have to lie and say they are shitting their guts out and can't come to work instead of being able to say that their brain -- an organ -- is unwell. Fuck the stigma, mental illness is real whether you can see it or not. And hey, a little empathy goes a long way...maybe someone is lying about it, but is it worth the risk to doubt and question instead of just asking yourself why they may feel the need to make such a claim?

Glance at my profile pic. I guarantee most people standing in front of that stage that night would be surprised to glance at my medical history. How could he suffer from that? It takes nerve to get up on a stage and share your art, right? But both my Psych and Primary doc have plenty of notes to back up my assertions and disorders.

I guess I can take solace in the fact that people like you will believe me then, I suppose.





Last edited by Lysdestic 2 months ago

random_soldier1337

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#12 2 months ago
Posted by Lysdestic
Posted by random_soldier1337
Posted by Lysdestic
Posted by random_soldier1337

I see. Well my circumstances, my rules. I give a hand only to have it my arm torn off, nearly most of the times.


So did you want help understanding anxiety disorders or validation for judging an acquaintance?

The first. I just find your sentimentality misplaced given you don't know anything my situation and my interactions.


You're right, I don't know anything about your situation or interactions, but the impression that I'm getting is that you don't know much of the real substance behind this persons background either. They're chatty. Have a lot of friends. These things do not preclude an anxiety disorder.

I know enough that I feel like the one with the mental disorder, not the other way around, the one that is ostracized for it. I try and be kind, treat them how they wish to be treated while feeling like a banged up extra wheel, left out of the loop. Even for important information, only spoken to when they actually need to. While the rest of them chat up throwing borderline insults at each other. I act as they do and all of a sudden I'm the bad guy for talking all the hot shit.

Perhaps they do, perhaps they don't. I don't know but how is it that I am the one that is setting them off, anxiety or not, while the rest are all hunky dory?


You seem to think that a lack of a clinical diagnosis in some people is somehow a detriment to those that suffer, but as a survivor of mental illness, I take your words as much more of an affront than those of anyone falsely claiming to have a disorder. I'd much prefer to err on the side of caution when such a claim is made. The thing I'm at a loss trying to figure out is how pontificating about whether or not someone actually does have a condition without any understanding of their medical or personal background isn't a detriment in it's own right?

The way I see it, somebody is going to get hurt either way. I have tried giving the benefit of the doubt only to have it spat in my face. Oh gee they must be ill, fatigued, burdened with work or some combination. Or maybe that's just the culture in whatever hick town they were brought up and they actually mean well. No they don't. They were nice for some fair length of time then did a face heel turn and have been like that ever since in a manner all too reminiscent of all the manipulative people I've met who trash you like a used condom once they realize they can't get any material gain out of you.


That just doesn't add up, man. Opinions like that are why so many people still choose to suffer silently from their mental illness. We still live in a society where people feel that they have to lie and say they are shitting their guts out and can't come to work instead of being able to say that their brain -- an organ -- is unwell. Fuck the stigma, mental illness is real whether you can see it or not. And hey, a little empathy goes a long way...maybe someone is lying about it, but is it worth the risk to doubt and question instead of just asking yourself why they may feel the need to make such a claim?

And? Where is my piece of the pie? Where the hell was everyone when they with their shit treatment of me made me miserable? They even made me doubt and hate myself. Maybe they would take more kindly to me if I was someone smarter, stronger, more attractive, silver tongued. But everyone just loves picking on the fat quiet guy until he lets loose at which point they all gang up because the only thing they can get out of him is cruel entertainment. And I doubt it will change unless I become some hotshot that they can butter up to get something really good.


Glance at my profile pic. I guarantee most people standing in front of that stage that night would be surprised to glance at my medical history. How could he suffer from that? It takes nerve to get up on a stage and share your art, right? But both my Psych and Primary doc have plenty of notes to back up my assertions and disorders.

I guess I can take solace in the fact that people like you will believe me then, I suppose.


You have a case. For whom I see, they're case is all too contrary. Even if, does that mean others are not supposed to get on edge when they act out?




Nemmerle Forum Mod

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#13 2 months ago
Posted by random_soldier1337

If one doesn't give me a good reason for acting out, just not in a asylum inmate way, one is an asshole. 

Maybe they are. The contents of their character is all their shit to deal with. It's between them and their god, as the old stories would say. That's not on you to deal with or judge. What's on you is: 'Someone is saying they need or want this particular thing, and I've a choice as to whether to give them that or not.' 

Look, I'll come right out and say it: If you're around people, and you're trying to give them what they need, and they're treating you like shit? It doesn't matter whether they've got a diagnosis or not. Diagnosis aren't a blanket pass for bad behaviour. I've got one, and I still get up out of bed every day and go into work and try to cheer people up, help them with their own issues, and generally function like a half-way decent human being.

It's hard. Sometimes I don't manage it and have to take some time away from other people in the office and go do something that's less... bleh... for a while - step gracefully aside when I recognise that my ability to function acceptably is impaired. But that's the standard of acceptable behaviour that I hold myself to. Turning around and snapping people's heads off because I'm not in a great place wouldn't be acceptable. 

If someone's persistently treating you like shit, they're bad for you! You'll end up with a mental health problem if you keep enabling that! That's not a good thing! Fuck their diagnosis in that particular instance. Leave. Get out of the situation! You don't have to put up with that from anyone regardless of their reasons.


Diagnosis aren't a blanket pass for bad behaviour. The idea of understanding mental health problems is for people who love us to be better able to give us the things we need to make life a bit easier. Because they love us as people and want us to be happy. That's the only sense in which understanding a diagnosis really helps (outside of a medical context, of course.) It's not supposed to be the motivation, or reason, for helping.

If the only reason you're helping someone, or making allowances for their behaviour, is because they have a diagnosis that's... yuck. Yeah. Not great. I'd prefer honest hatred to a condescending good will. That sort of thing isn't good for either of us. It will make you miserable and it will remove a standard to which they might otherwise have aspired. That's not doing anyone any favours in the long run! It just makes the world worse for everyone!

Treat people like people first, and insofar as you judge them judge them on that basis.

Posted by random_soldier1337

You were the one who mentioned once that empathy is difficult if not impossible because you're not psychic. 'Why should I suffer the weight of YOUR  particular "understanding"?

Empathy - feeling what someone else feels - is very different to, 'Someone is saying they need this thing, do I want to give it to them or not?' I don't feel the same as most of the people I help, and don't pretend to understand how they feel. One doesn't need that understanding to decide whether what another is asking for is acceptable or not.




Last edited by Nemmerle 2 months ago

random_soldier1337

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#14 2 months ago

That post actually clears up things a bit better.




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