"Gamer" Jokes 32 replies

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Twisted God

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7th April 2004

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#1 9 years ago

I mean that very generally. Any gamer-related concepts, or otherwise "nerdy" things built into the joke are fine. One I like a lot goes:

Jesus dies one day, and is resurrected three days later. Talk about lag.

A vegetarian goes into a resaurant and orders a veggie burger. He takes a bit and looks at it for a second, and then says, "OMG! WTF! BBQ!"


The Great Charm

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14th April 2007

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#2 9 years ago

A geek wants to fuck a prep but he can't because he has no penis


Nature's best screw up.

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27th July 2005

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#3 9 years ago

I beg to differ, Awesome.


I didn't make it!

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#4 9 years ago

I was once watching the grand finale of a fireworks display wondering why the game wasn't lagging with so many explosions...

Serio VIP Member

The Dane

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11th November 2006

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#5 9 years ago

You know you've spent too much time with technology when you begin to say #0000FF instead of Blue.


I don't know what I'm doing

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16th March 2008

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#6 9 years ago

You know you're a loser when all of your best friends' names end with numbers.




54,945 XP

5th August 2003

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#7 9 years ago

In the spirit of gaming, I bring forth the profound words of the New York Badass, Phil Baroni, on how to get girls (from an interview):

NS: Do you have any advice for the nerds on how to get girls?

PB: Do steroids, lift heavy weights, get contacts, go tanning. And stop playing all those gay fucking video games. You can’t get pussy in front of a TV playing games with your geeky friends. Go out to night clubs and bars, hit the beach. If you got money, floss. Whatever you do, don’t be yourself.


Call me Pingwin

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26th May 2005

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#8 9 years ago

He was piglet, he has no right to talk.


I didn't make it!

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#9 9 years ago

A computer nerd is swimming at the ocean for the first time in his life. Suddenly, he starts to drown. So, he starts shouting: "F1! F1! F1!" =p

Primarch Vulkan VIP Member

For the Emperor! Knights of Caliban!

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16th March 2004

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#10 9 years ago
Octovon;4903891In the spirit of gaming, I bring forth the profound words of the New York Badass, Phil Baroni, on how to get girls (from an interview):

Thats not really a joke that guy his being an asshole...

Here's one from the World of Warcraft: Two Taurans are sitting on the end of a pier, waiting for the ship, when one asks the other, "How long do you think this pier is?" "I dunno. Let's find out," says the other. "Maybe that guy in the bait shop has something we can measure it with." They go to the bait shop, but the best the merchant can come up with is a 12 inch ruler. "We can still measure the pier," says the first Tauran. "Look. The boards are 8 inches wide, and there's a 2 inch slit between boards, so all we have to do is multiply the number of boards by 8 and the number of slits by 2, add them together and we have the length of the pier in inches." "OK," says the other Tauran. "You count the boards and I'll count the slits." So the Taurans start walking down the pier, one counting boards and the other counting the slits between them. When they get to the end of the pier, the one counting slits walks right off the end and falls into the water. The other looks down at him and says, "Don't you know? When you're out of slits, you're out of pier!"

A Waterdhavian, a Zhent and a Bedine walk into a tavern and order drinks. The Waterdhavian slams his down and shatters the glass in the fireplace. "In Waterdeep," he says, "we have so much money, we never have to drink from the same glass twice." The Zhent also slams his drink down, hurls his glass into the fireplace and says, "The Zhentarim Army is so well supplied, we don't have to drink with the same glass twice, either!" The Bedine finishes his drink and calmly sets his empty glass on the bar. Then, quick as lightning, he draws a dagger from each sleeve of his robe and cuts the throats of the Zhent and the Waterdhavian before they can react. To the startled bartender, the Bedine says, "In Anauroch, we have so many meddling Zhents and Waterdhavians, we never have to drink with the same ones twice."


[color=#000000][size=2][b][i]Heralds of the coming doom, Like the cry of the Raven, we are drawn, This oath of war and vengeance, On a blade of exalted iron sworn, With blood anointed swords