I don't really know what to say.
I had a hospital appointment this morning regarding a burst blood vessel in my right eye and it turns out it's down to my diabetes. I asked if there's anything I can do, expecting good news. No, there isn't. Long and short of it is I'm going blind. I'm fucked. I don't know what to do or say.
I always said the one sense I couldn't live without is my sight and now I'm losing it and with it, my will to live. I won't be able to see my daughter anymore, do you have any idea how much that hurts me? Urgh.
I'm sorry for the rant.
You don't have to be sorry for your rant. You're going through very heavy shit, the least you can do to ease off your heart (even for a tiny bit) is rant.
I'm sorry man. I can't say I know how you feel, so I won't say corny things to cheer you up. All I have to say is keep your will up and don't do stupid things.
I am apologising, I just don't want to sound like an attention-seeker, I just really don't know what to say or do or anything. My sight obviously means a lot to me, as it does to anyone, and the fact that one day I will wake up and not be able to see scares the shit out of me.
I can't possibly imagine what you are going through right now. I wish there were something that I could do to help you.
The only thing I could possibly think of is if I drastically change my lifestyle. No drink, no drugs, no fatty foods, plenty of exercise, regular eye checks, lean meats, etc but even thats no guarantee. I really appreciate the thought, Smeg, but the only person who has a chance of doing something is me.
Voice of joy and sunshine
26th May 2003
Did they give you a time frame?
Depends entirely on how well I manage my diabetes from this point onward. Look after myself I can have it for another year or so, neglect it and I could lose my sight within months. I'm hoping that if I look after myself I can perform a miracle and prevent it entirely but I don't know, it's just a lot to take in. I honestly cannot imagine living life without my sight.
17th June 2002
I don't understand. If it's a burst blood vessel in your right eye, surely it'd just be your right eye you'd lose sight in? Why would your left one go as well? Or do you already have sight problems in your left eye?
Well, either way it sucks. Not much I can say really. I'm sure it'd be small comfort to say things like "there are plenty of blind folks who manage to lead relatively normal lives" and all of the stuff people normally say in situations like these.
Don't lose the will to live though. You might not be able to see your daughter if you do lose your sight, and that is a terrible reality to have to face, but you'll still be able to hear her, feel her when she hugs you, and talk to her and guide her through life (sorry about the unintentional pun there). And whether you can see her or not, she'll still be able to see you, and she'll still need you.
I've always had problems with my left eye, it's the weaker one of the two. I had to wear a patch when I was younger over my right eye to try and strengthen the sight but it didn't work. If it were working normally, then losing sight in my right eye wouldn't be as big a deal but as I've already lost sight in my left eye, losing sight in my right eye will leave me completely blind, a prospect that, really, scares the hell out of me for a number of reasons.
I know my daughter will be able to see me and need me but it's just a painful thought to think about that one day I'll never be able to see her again. I won't do anything stupid like taking my life as I could never do that to my little girl, but it's just a mixture of emotions going round in my head right now.
Sorry to hear that. Maybe you can get a second opinion from someone who specialises on diabetes-related eye problems?
Mr. Matt;5593725 And whether you can see her or not, she'll still be able to see you, and she'll still need you.
I agree with Mr.Matt here. Your kid(s) will still need you and I'm sure that they'll be able to help you as well somehow.