This is very very funny 13 replies

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AzH

I'm too cool to Post

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17th September 2003

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#1 13 years ago

This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.

This is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.......

Dear Sir,

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient. I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.

Rather than carry the bricks down by hand I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135 lbs.

Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form. Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.

Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain. At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight.

As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body. Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.

I hope this answers your inquiry.

Kind Regards,

Mike Pashby




colonel_bob

Here & There

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4th June 2004

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#2 13 years ago

:lol: I've seen this before, I could just never really remember it exactly. Do you really think its true? I guess it could be...




Phoenix_22 VIP Member

46 and 2, are just ahead of me

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23rd September 2004

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#3 13 years ago

:rofl: That must have hurt, two broken legs, a fractured skull, and a broken collarbone...seems he's pretty close to dead anyway.




Mast3rofPuppets VIP Member

08'aIgnorance is not an excuse

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28th November 2003

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#4 13 years ago

Haha, my teacher told that story when we talked about work safety. Oh man, the world is full of stupid people :lol:.




*Soviet.Power

Ex-MøđęRāŧǿr ø₣ Geňęrāł Gāmíňĝ

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31st January 2004

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#5 13 years ago

:lol: Owch, that must of hurt. Though he deserves it for being so stupid.




KoЯsakoff

Captain

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7th November 2003

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#6 13 years ago

more dead than alive? *0uch*




Steakboy

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26th June 2004

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#7 13 years ago

a friend of mine did this skit in a talent show a couple years ago, still funny tho :lol:




Pethegreat VIP Member

Lord of the Peach

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19th April 2004

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#8 13 years ago

ouch. As JP says: people are stupid and shold be shot. I am beginning to aggree with him.




-Aqualung-

GF's Sexiest Banjo Player

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4th May 2004

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#9 13 years ago

This story has been around for a while. I even have an Irish musician singing a version of it.




Miltonmonkey

This is my User Title

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10th July 2004

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#10 13 years ago

Talk about bad luck.




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