I need advice 37 replies

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Fetter

How much room does this t

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14th October 2006

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#1 11 years ago

Ok, I'll start at the begininng. My parents have been fighting for about 3 years and they finally announced that they are getting divorced. A big factor was that my mom had been sent to rehab for alcohol, and my dad was supposedly 'a huge jerk'. I've been living with my mom for the past year or so, and things are steadily getting worse. She's drinking again (and smoking weed), the house is never clean, she's always yelling at me and my brother (who's only 1), and on top of this, I cant talk to my dad because he hates me. He hates me because I'm not some huge, popular, smart jock who he can show off to my grandfather and all my aunt, uncles, and cousins. So, since im not like this, he hits me and basically calls me a stupid, immature loser who isnt good at anything. I dont have any friends ('cause im considered 'weird and scary'), so i pass my time on the internet and occasionally play some xbox, which leads to almost every girl I meet calling me a nerd or simply running away. I cant change who i already am (if i was a bit younger i could). So quite simply, WHAT DO I DO?!? I'm starting to get extremely depressed. Al I ever see is my mom drinking, and it's really wearing me down. I ask her to stop, and she blows up on me. I dont really have anything to live for.... life is overrated. since this is the only place i can really go, im asking what i should do.




Reno

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21st March 2006

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#2 11 years ago

First of all. Man that seriously sucks ass.

Your mom needs rehab. A drug addict isn't qualified to raise kids. Call the cops next time you see her smoking a blunt.

As far as your dad goes. Next time your over at his home, get him pissed and take a hard hit in the face. Then go to school with a shiner and head straight to a teacher crying your eyes out. The cops will set your dad straight in a ny second.

If you have family that are cool they'll place you with them, otherwise they'll place you in a foster home for a little while. Since your 15 you got about 3 years before things start really getting cool. But I promise you, things get cool. Just hang tight and trust yourself. When your 15 most kids don't realize how cool they really are. Some even torture themselves thinking they aren't good enough to be like everyone else. Everything that makes you different makes you cool. I promise you man your cool whether you know it or not. Just the fact your on filefront and your brave enough to post that makes you a cool mother fucker.




Aeroflot

I would die without GF

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2nd May 2003

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#3 11 years ago

I know what it is like to have no friends. Last semester was my first at my university, and I had only a few friends... mostly people from my high school and my roommate. My roommate and I hung out all the time, and I was happy as can be. Then, one day, he and I had a fight and didn't speak for weeks. The reason he and I had a fight was because I tend to have small tantrums, and he said I am an asshole. I was depressed. I just lost my best friend in college.

I took a long walk in the rain that night. I walked for miles and miles, all the while being battered by wind, rain, and the cold. All that was going through my head was how much I fucked up my friendship. What I would have given for that day to have not happened. I took long walks for days. Then, I told myself to suck it up.

I began hanging out with other friends (my roommate and I went to this Christian Fellowship thing on Fridays, and there I met some really cool people). So, I hung out with a couple of people from there, and I got so close to this one guy. My friendship troubles were over. He introduced me to all his friends, and all of a sudden I was happy again.

What was really awesome about this guy was, he didn't mind me being a sarcastic asshole--myself, in other words. In fact, he liked that I didn't try to put a front on, that I was just being who I was.

My advice to you is to suck it up, keep your chin high, and find someone you can hang out with. I usually don't like being at big social events, but I had to go to make a friend. That is what you should do. Go out, get out of your house, find some people to hang out with, and try to forget anything else.

Oh, and my roommate and I are friends again.




Reno

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21st March 2006

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#4 11 years ago

Suck it up? When your moms a druggy and your dad hits you? I can't believe thats your advice to this kid. That might be good advice for someone who's complaining about a breakup, but not for this. There's some serious shit going on in this kids life. I've seen people in highschool kill themselves over shit like that. They don't see a way out. Graduation just seems forever away and there doesn't seem to be a break in sight.

Suck it up is the worst advice I could imagine giving someone who feels trapped.

In these situations its better to follow the eye for an eye philosophy. If someones fucking you over you fuck them over. Afterwards sit back and enjoy the show. When they realize you fight back they become more wary around you because they know your smart enough to fight back. You'll get problems straightened out, you'll get respect, and you'll get freedom.




Reno

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21st March 2006

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#5 11 years ago

Suck it up? When your moms a druggy and your dad hits you? I can't believe thats your advice to this kid. That might be good advice for someone who's complaining about a breakup, but not for this. There's some serious shit going on in this kids life. I've seen people in highschool kill themselves over shit like that. They don't see a way out. Graduation just seems forever away and there doesn't seem to be a break in sight.

Suck it up is the worst advice I could imagine giving someone who feels trapped.

In these situations its better to follow the eye for an eye philosophy. If someones fucking you over you fuck them over. Afterwards sit back and enjoy the show. When they realize you fight back they become more wary around you because they know your smart enough to fight back. You'll get problems straightened out, you'll get respect, and you'll get freedom.




Aeroflot

I would die without GF

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2nd May 2003

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#6 11 years ago

Bob L. Scrachy;3471855Suck it up? When your moms a druggy and your dad hits you? I can't believe thats your advice to this kid. That might be good advice for someone who's complaining about a breakup, but not for this. There's some serious shit going on in this kids life. I've seen people in highschool kill themselves over shit like that. They don't see a way out. Graduation just seems forever a way and there doesn't seem to be a break in sight.

Suck it up is the worst advice I could imagine giving someone who feels trapped.

In these situations its better to follow the eye for an eye philosophy. If someones fucking you over you fuck them over. Afterwards sit back and enjoy the show. When they realize you fight back they become more careful around you because they know your smart enough to fight back.

Dude, he needs to raise his morale, not worsten the situation by fighting back.

Sucking it up is a great way to get through this (given I don't know exactly how he feels, but it has always worked for me). Be egotistical. Say to yourself that you are better than these people and you will survive. There will be a better day.




Liquid fire

I pretend I'm cooler than AzH

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9th June 2006

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#7 11 years ago

Well Im not good at advise anymore so I'll just relate to you. Long ago...when I was about 6 my father was on some powerfull drugs of some sort...he was having an obvious affair with another woman besides my mother. One day he came home loaded on something powerfull. He took my mother in the garage and beat her senseless . I heard screams...yells. I went into the garage and I saw my mother being slammed around by 2 by 4s...and my father rode the garage door down on her body repeatively with his own weight.

She was immobile for some time after. I was never socially the same again. I regrett that day every day but not because of what happened but because of how I reacted to it.

Maybe your situation is a tad different but if you spread your situation out it has just as much trauma as mine did if not more.

Dont make the mistakes I made though. Like myself you are stuck living these events for a while. Mine physchologically and yours are just every day challenge. We live in the same hurt. Only I want you to be a better man then me please.

Go out there and force yourself to be sociall dont let your parents mistakes be yours. As for your fathers respect who cares about it anyways ? Id refuse to see him at all for awhile . AS for your mothers respect who cares?

Ive taken breaks from my father who now is reformed but still an ass at times. I see him every other week end I can stand him.

Id take breaks from the old man if I was you. Also like I was saying dont let the hard knocks bring you down but let them tuffen you up. I was weak durring my parents fights and problems and they became my problems and lasted even longer for me then they did them. Not because I was damned but because of how I go on reacting to it the way I do.

Im afaird to be hurt. Im afaird to be with anyone in life. Im afaird of comittment. Im afaird to socialize because my father who called me by my 1st name as a "dumby retard" knocked down my self respect.

Dont be beaten there are plently of allies out there to talk to each day and I am one of those allies. Make friends and find the allies and if people wont be your friend ..then they wouldnt they been good friends to begin with and arent worth your time anyways.

Just seek out allies and maybe eventually move in with some. With a little friendship and help alot can be done in life. Im your friend and I will AIM you XFIRE you or whatever any day you want to. Just bump me a message.

Dont be like me though , move on and get what you want out of life dont let your parents take away what you want from life. Stand firm and do what you want to do in life and beat them be better then they could ever be because you already are. You just have to go on and you know you dont want make the same mistakes they did . You are a better person then them and you are stronger than them!

Im 20 years old almost and Ive never been out with a girl once. Ive talked to a girl 3 times in my whole life...dont become this...no one else should be like me. I dont want you to be .




Reno

The professional.

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21st March 2006

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#8 11 years ago

Act now. Feel vindicated knowing your not only helping yourself, but also your brother and your parents. Neither of which are able to help themselves at this point.

Aeroflotte;3471863Dude, he needs to raise his morale, not worsten the situation by fighting back.

Sucking it up is a great way to get through this (given I don't know exactly how he feels, but it has always worked for me). Be egotistical. Say to yourself that you are better than these people and you will survive. There will be a better day.

He can't make it that much more worsened then it already is. Thats the point. Both his parents are harming themselves, those around them, and especially their kids. If he doesn't do something now he condemns himself and his little brother to further mistreatment.




Liquid fire

I pretend I'm cooler than AzH

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9th June 2006

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#9 11 years ago

Bob L. Scrachy;3471868Act now. Feel vindicated knowing your not only helping yourself, but also your brother and your parents. Neither of which are able to help themselves at this point.

He can't make it that much more worsened then it already is. Thats the point. Both his parents are harming themselves, those around them, and especially their kids. If he doesn't do something now he condemns himself and his little brother to further mistreatment.

Yes remember I dread my childhood trauma not because of what happened ...thats the way life is but because I didnt do the right thing at that time. Call the cops...or anything. Do the right thing and you will beat this challenge.




Aeroflot

I would die without GF

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2nd May 2003

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#10 11 years ago

Bob L. Scrachy;3471868Act now. Feel vindicated knowing your not only helping yourself, but also your brother and your parents. Neither of which are able to help themselves at this point.

He can't make it that much more worsened then it already is. Thats the point. Both his parents are harming themselves, those around them, and especially their kids. If he doesn't do something now he condemns himself and his little brother to further mistreatment.

He's dealing with a mother who is drug addict. The last thing you want to do is tangle with a someone who drinks and gets high all the time. Yelling at a drunk is not very productive.