is it wrong to refuse 7 replies

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phil2000 halo mad

but i wanna push the button

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1st August 2005

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#1 13 years ago

while i was working to pay for my psp it looked like i was not going to have enough in time, as ny next pay was being held up a bit, my grandad offers to pay the last £70 of the price and i dont have to pay it all back i refused saying that i had wanted to pay for this myself and was not wanting to buy it with hand outs. after my garandad had left my mum had sasid it was rude and that i should of taken the money and that i had insulted my grandad. so is it wrong to refuse and is it insulting to the giver?

Pethegreat VIP Member

Lord of the Peach

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19th April 2004

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#2 13 years ago

What you did was right I think. Although your grandpa was being generous, he could have stuck that 70 pounds in the bank for you. If you don't need the free money why take it when the person who is offering it could use it themselves?

Nemmerle Forum Mod

Voice of joy and sunshine

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26th May 2003

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#3 13 years ago

It's not wrong exactly. It's good diplomacy to accept a gift with good grace but at the same time if you wanted to do it with your own money then I can see how that's acceptable.

At the moment I'm filling out a form for an EMA (Educational Maintenance Allowance for those of you abroad.) I don't really want one, the less I can have to do with this ------ government the better, but my parents want me to get one so *shrugs*. Sometimes we have to do things we don't like so that others will be pleased. Who knows, maybe I'll need the money one day.

Personally I think you should have taken the money, put it in the bank/building society and just left it there, then given it back when you'd payed for the thing with your own money.


My E-peen wouldn't fit here :(

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4th October 2004

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#4 13 years ago

If he insisted I would have taken the money, but payed all of it back.


something to believe.

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19th February 2005

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#5 13 years ago

yeahthat.gif ( To Kadaj ).

Admiral Donutz VIP Member

Wanna go Double Dutch?

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9th December 2003

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#6 13 years ago

I would have said you want to pay it out of my own pocke, thanked for the offerr and politly turn it down. It would like the polie thing to do. If he really "wanted" to help you out a bit he could always have said "well i still want to help you out so here you have 10 euros/dollars/..".


Biggest F-ing A-hole 2010

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24th April 2003

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#7 13 years ago

What you did was morally right. Your refusal was due to your consideration for your grandfather so I think you were right.



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13th April 2005

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#8 13 years ago

maybe someday, when you're older, and have children & grandchildren you will understand the joy that they (parents & grandparents) get from giving.

Perhaps it would have been wiser to accept his offer - with gratitude - explain that you didn't want to burden him but that you're extremely grateful...

In any event, I think he probably understands your refusal. You might want to clear it up at some point in the future - e.g., "I meant no disrespect, and I am grateful that you're my granddad...etc..."... I wish my grandparents were still alive. I'd do things differently... I think I'd appreciate them. *Sighs*... c'est la vie