17th June 2002
I'm going away next week, so I'm not going to be around from now until I get back. That's nearly two weeks. I think. One... two... three... no, two weeks. I can count! OMFGWTFLOL! Don't misunderstand me -- I'm not telling you this because I actually care whether you care, or to garner attention, it's more of a motivation to stop myself coming back to the forums. By posting this I will be hesitant to come back to the forums until I'm back from my holiday for fear of people shouting horrific abuse at me. Otherwise I'll just come here instead of doing boring work that needs to be done, and I'll be completely farzled when the time comes to get onto the plane and terrify the fearful with cries of "Oh my god the starboard wing has fallen off, we're all going TO DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH!!!" and suchlike. So yeah, I have stuff to do and I won't do it if I keep coming here. But unfortunately I can't leave without knowing that you will have some sort of supervision while I'm gone. That would be irresponsible of me. And I don't mean the moderators and administrators -- no offense to you guys, but you lack the psychiatric training to properly deal with these people. Thus, it is with great pleasure that I introduce to you my assistant, SUPERPANDA: His name is SuperPanda but you can call him either Super, Panda, or Sue on Saturdays. He can do all sorts of really neat stuff like flying, using a circular saw with one hand, and setting fire to strange-looking children. At the moment he's... um... falling head-first down a slide, but don't let that fool you -- he's an extremely intelligent and powerful panda (hence his name) and he will [color=red]totally obliterate you[/color] if you so much as blink in a way he doesn't like. Kinda. Well actually, he'll probably lick you. On the face if you're lucky -- I won't say any more than that, but I will suggest that you don't take your pants off if you're around him. He's a bit... um... shall we say, 'playful'. Anyway, SuperPanda is your Supreme Master until October 5th, so make sure you let him rule your life in every way. Not that I hold any power whatsoever over any one of you (except maybe for myself, but even that's debatable), but I just wanted to see if anybody actually let a picture of a panda falling head-first down a slide rule their life. Make sure you make a note of all the super-cool stuff SuperPanda makes you lick while you're in his service so that I can read all about it when I get back. Bye! :cya: [Mumbles something rude about a member whose name begins with 'A' before he leaves]
I would die without my life.
19th January 2004
[indent]You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Mr. Matt again.
08'aIgnorance is not an excuse
28th November 2003
Matt has rocked for a long, long time, Now it's time for him to pass the torch. He has songs of wildebeests and angels, He has soared on the wings of a demon.
It's time to pass the torch, You're too old to rock, no more rockin' for you. We're takin' you to a home, But we will sing a song about you. And we will make sure that you're very well taken care of. You'll tell us secrets that you've learned. Raow!
Your sauce will mix with ours, And we'll make a good goulash baby. Matt, time to go! You must give your cape and scepter to me. And a smaller one for Biggus. Go! Go! Matt! Matt! Oh!
Wanna go Double Dutch?
9th December 2003
The cream of the crop
20th August 2003
Mr. Matt [Mumbles something rude about a member whose name begins with 'A' before he leaves]
*pulls out a picture of Mr Matt, shoves it infront of a baby panda Aeg has been keeping in the celler for 5 months, and says* "this is your enemy. know him for what he is! HE MADE YOU GO TO THE CELLERS AND EAT TOMATOES! do you want revenge?"
*Baby Panda rips Mr Matt's picture away from Aeg and proceeds to lick and rub his head against the picture in a loving fashion*
"damnit....umm...Mr Matt got rid of your favourite show, Panda Tales"
*Baby Panda stops, looks up with eyes aflame and hair on end*
'yeah! Mr Matt HATED Panda Tales. he told me once, 'If there is anything i hate more than Panda Tales, it's Panda Stories'"
*Baby Panda stands on hind legs, lets out a roar that sounds almost human, and breaks out of Fort Knox to find Mr Matt*
I want t3h panda.
Thats one fine looking panda there.:nodding:
Jeff is a mean boss
28th July 2002
NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! i wont know if my answer to Mr. Matts question about Slimer is right for TWO WEEKS!!!!!!
NOES! Mr Matt! We wubs j00! :bawl:
We don't wants a stinky fluffly-haired-white-and-black-smelly-poop-laying panda in you stead! Mr. MATT! NOOOOOOO! *takes off Darth Vader suit* Someone hold me! Hold me!