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Guest

I didn't make it!

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#1 7 years ago

A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie. He decides to test it at dinner.

Dad: Son, where were you today during school hours?

Son: At school.

The robot slaps the son.

Son: Ok! I watched a DVD at my mates.

Dad: Which one?

Son: Kung Fu Panda

The robot slaps the son again.

Son: Ok! It was a Porno.

Dad: WHAT? When I was your age I didn’t even know what porn was!

The robot slaps the Dad.

Mom: Hahahahaha! After all he’s your son.

The robot slaps the mom.




Lindale Forum Mod

Mister Angry Rules Guy

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#2 7 years ago

[COLOR=orange]Query: How many members of the U.S.S. Enterprise A[/COLOR][COLOR=orange] does it take to change a light bulb?[/COLOR] [COLOR=orange][/COLOR] [COLOR=orange][/COLOR] [COLOR=orange]

Spoiler: Show
[/COLOR] [COLOR=orange]Answer: Seven. Scotty has to report to Captain Kirk that the light bulb in The Engineering Section is getting dim, at which point Kirk will send Bones to pronounce the bulb dead (although he'll immediately claim that dammit, Jim, he's a doctor, not an electrician). Scotty, after checking around, realizes that they have no more new light bulbs, and complains that he "canna" see in the dark. Kirk will make an emergency stop at the next uncharted planet, Alpha Regula IV, to procure a light bulb from the natives, who, are friendly, but seem to be hiding something.[/COLOR] [COLOR=orange][/COLOR] [COLOR=orange]Kirk, Spock, Bones, Yeoman Rand, and two red shirt security officers beam down to the planet, where the two security officers are promptly killed by the natives, and the rest of the landing party is captured. As something begins to develop between the Captain and Yeoman Rand, Scotty, back in orbit, is attacked by a Klingon destroyer and must warp out of orbit.[/COLOR] [COLOR=orange][/COLOR] [COLOR=orange]Although badly outgunned, he cripples the Klingon and races back to the planet in order to rescue Kirk et. al. who have just saved the natives' from an awful fate and, as a reward, been given all light bulbs they can carry. The new bulb is then inserted and the Enterprise continues on its five-year mission.[/COLOR] [COLOR=orange]

[/COLOR]


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Andron Taps Forum Mod

Faktrl is Best Pony

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#3 7 years ago

lol


"I'd shush her zephyr." ~ Zephyr.



Lindale Forum Mod

Mister Angry Rules Guy

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#4 7 years ago

[COLOR=orange]If you wish for a giggle, use Ubuntu. Go to the command prompt, and type in "fortune." The random stuff it gives you will give you quite a long while of entertainment. :nodding:[/COLOR]


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Guest

I didn't make it!

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#5 7 years ago

One boy: When my grandfather died he left 10 million dollars. Second boy: When my grandfather died he left 20 million dollars. Third boy: That’s nothing, When my grandfather died he left the whole world.




Andron Taps Forum Mod

Faktrl is Best Pony

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#6 7 years ago

dawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww :doh:


"I'd shush her zephyr." ~ Zephyr.



Ensign Riles VIP Member

No! I'm Spamacus!

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17th June 2003

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#7 7 years ago

Finally. Some funny advertisers. You're hired.




Nittany Tiger Forum Mod

*Shrug*

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15th September 2004

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#8 7 years ago

I came in expecting a lame joke from a spambot or adbot. I arrive to something that's actually good.




Totes

Misanthrope

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7th January 2011

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#9 7 years ago

A man walked into a bar.

He said, "Ow".




Darkness Knight 15

Zerstörung.

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15th May 2003

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#10 7 years ago

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Spoiler: Show

TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!! LOLOLOLOLOLOL TEEHEE HOO HOO HEE HEE HEE!!!!! TOO HOO HOO!!!

...

Moving on. The jokes before the one in my post here are all hilarious. This one is shitty. That fact is the joke in itself. Also, your mother.