We are here. FH. In force. We're in your house. We're in your bedroom. We're going through your dresser drawers......Just what the hell is an "anal plug", anyway? Do you use it with that tube of "Astro Lube" I saw?
Don't try calling for help - we've already entered the re-direction codes to the comm sats, blown the cell towers, and we're even in the central telephone office. We have the mayor's office, the fire station and the police station. All the roads in and out are barricaded. You are, as they say, our prisoners. Don't do anything stupid and maybe you'll live through this.
How did it happen? Well, we loaded up early....
...and we came in silently...
It looks like all your Spam are belong to us.
You may find half of your squad already incapacitated.
The more you shoot the more of us will rise from the ashes, for we are not physical but we are en entity, a spirit. WE ARE TEH FHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
We're all in your stuff.
Oh no... There is a little FHer clogging up my barrel!
I got your DVD's and I'm selling on the street in Times Square for cheap oh what now
A ballad for those brave warriors we sent into the fray
The fighting hampsters of Calontir (Sung to the song "Ballad Of The Green Berets")
Fighting hampsters from the sky, Some will live and some will die; Hampsters have nothing to fear, The fighting hampsters of Calontir.
Silver tape upon their backs, A broadsword is all they lack; Fifty hampsters fight a war, They won't win without fifty more.
Trained by jumping off the roof, Trained in combat -- tooth to tooth; Hampsters fight both far and near, The fighting hampsters of Calontir.
Riding high upon our helms, Their war-cry -- it overwhelms; All opponents become weak, At their fearsome "squeaky-squeak".
Back at home, Master Pavel waits, His fighting hampster has met his fate; He has died drinking beer, The fighting hampster of Calontir.
Estrella verse: Once again, it's off to war, This time we number a dozen more; (alt: but a score) We will fight for those in need, So this year it's with Caid. (alt:Once again,...)
Fighting hampsters jump from planes, Fighting hampsters fall like rain; Some will live, but most will die, Stupid creatures cannot fly!
Our bard! Do it with pipes and I'll follow you anywhere!
Yes. Quite the imagination.