Daily Syndrome #5 10 replies

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Museum

the operator

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28th October 2005

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#1 8 years ago
5-2.png[SIZE="2"]"Muse is f**king sexy." - IcePure[/SIZE]

Oh, hello there. I didn't expect you. Welcome to the 5th issue of the Daily Syndrome, the first of many multiples of 5. And what a special issue it is today! There are all sorts of stories from various subjects, covering many serious issues that affect the world today.

As usual with the Daily Syndrome, you can join the Group, where you can find hundreds of posts (one) detailing how to become world famous. It also has a nice logo, so if that's something you like then I'd recommend it. You could even end up with your own article featured in a forthcoming issue! So, I suggest you get into there and put your fingers all over my join button.

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That Wind Is A Little Sharp

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Some things in this world are outside. By outside, I mean not confined within a building, but literally free in the Outside World. In fact, a large amount of things are outside, and free to wander about as they please. Unfortunately, this includes dust.

Dust has long been an enemy of mine. It gets into places it shouldn't be getting to, and it likes to stay there. It's also fairly light. This means that it can easily be picked up by a breeze, and whipped along at a jolly pace on a collision course with everything in its path. Dust isn't picky, it will annoy anyone. Which is why it hurts more when it chooses you.

Dust within the eye is a terrible thing to have to endure. It gets all up in there, and scratches incessantly.

As far as I know, it's still in there.

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Who Needs A Second Chance?

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Winning things is easy. Firstly, you must make sure that you enter, as you have to be In It To Win It. That is basic. If you don't know that then maybe the winning things business isn't for you. I'm serious here.

So, step one is to ensure that you are a part of it. This, of course, leads straight into step two: letting the competition take place. If you have to do anything, then it makes sense to do it. Otherwise, you may not stand very much chance of Winning The Thing. It is possible that simply by entering you have made yourself eligible for the prize. This is known as a Good Deal.

Now comes the part that most people assume to be tricky. Winning the thing. There are many people who will go into long and in-depth explanations of how unlikely you are to win, but they are all wrong. Statistics may be nice, but they are impractical. After you have entered a competition there are 2 different things that can happen next.

  1. You win the competition.
  2. You do not win the competition.

Weighing up the options, there is a 1 in 2 chance that you will be successful. That's almost 50%! This proves that all competitions are worth entering. By reading this you agree to hand over at least 15% of whatever you win to the funds of the Daily Syndrome.

And now we head over to somebody who did exactly that! Entered a competition, then won that competition. Other people also entered, but did not win, proving that there are only two options. "What competition are you writing about?" I hear you ask. Read on, good reader, and you shall discover!

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Competition Winner!

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Some of you may recall that in the last issue there was a Really Short Poetry contest, with many fantastic entries. While every entry was brilliant, and I enjoyed reading them all, there was one in particular that shook the very foundations of the word 'brilliant'.

And the winner is...

[SIZE="4"][COLOR="Green"]Killer Kyle[/COLOR]![/SIZE]

for this brilliant entry.

There once was man of spam, That posted his profession so often that he was perma-banned.

I'm sure you'll all be aware that the man of spam in question is none other than our splicing spammer Splicer101! So, everybody, send your messages of congratulations to the new Spam Forum Poet Laureate!

Today's newspaper was brought to you by:

cst.pngsftol.png

To advertise here, please contact Muse Syndrome by PM. Advertisements subject to terms, conditions and electrification.

Previous Issues: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4




IcePure

Pimp of FileFront.

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30th January 2008

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#2 8 years ago

You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Muse Syndrome again.

Love it, dude :p




SeinfeldisKindaOk

5.56 smoke Haji every day

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18th July 2008

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#3 8 years ago

What about Russian roulette? Winning means not getting shot, which is more likely when not playing at all. Therefore you can essentially "win it" without being "in it" because by not entering you've achieved the same result as the winner.




Nittany Tiger Forum Mod

*Shrug*

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15th September 2004

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#4 8 years ago

[COLOR="Magenta"]Yay! I won!

I'll take my self-satisfaction prize now. Feels good, man.[/COLOR]




Guest

I didn't make it!

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#5 8 years ago

Killer Kyle;5416400[COLOR=Magenta]Yay! I won!

I'll take my self-satisfaction prize now. Feels good, man.[/COLOR]

*pulls a gun out*

oh look you lost

*pulls trigger*




Museum

the operator

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28th October 2005

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#6 8 years ago
Professor Dr. Scientist;5416355What about Russian roulette? Winning means not getting shot, which is more likely when not playing at all. Therefore you can essentially "win it" without being "in it" because by not entering you've achieved the same result as the winner.

No. Only by surviving the competition itself can you become the winner of Russian roulette. If I wrote down some numbers on a piece of paper, it is not the same as entering a lottery draw.




SeinfeldisKindaOk

5.56 smoke Haji every day

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18th July 2008

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#7 8 years ago

But by not playing I achieve the same result: survival. I guess playing for money could change the result, or if someone will shoot me if I don't play like in The Deer Hunter.




Museum

the operator

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28th October 2005

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#8 8 years ago

If you simply don't play then yes, you will survive. But living in general is not the same as winning Russian roulette. You could work hard for a while to earn a sum of money, or you could win it in a competition. The result is the same, gaining the money, but only one of those would be achieved through success in a competition.




V.

For Vendetta!

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1st April 2008

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#9 8 years ago

Contest is over.




Museum

the operator

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28th October 2005

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#10 8 years ago

Indeed it is.




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