FilesNews - Issue #09 8 replies

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Serio Advanced Member

The Dane

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10th November 2006

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#1 3 years ago



BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND


GAMEFRONT OUTAGE


As many of our - no doubt loyal - readers may have noticed, our regular communications and distribution channels were interrupted briefly for a period of a few months. As soon as the outage was noticed, the Royal Ethics & Loyal Llama Yellowcoats were called in to investigate. REALLY initially suspected a tourist attack after finding baggage left everywhere, candy wrappers stuck to the walls in a threatening message that turned out to be a sex worker's hotline, and a bewildered man from Exeter asking for change. 


"It was very strange," Richard Socker told FilesNews, recalling the long and tiring investigation. "It turns out a mole we had employed in an internship made a mistake when he was writing out reports. Instead of a tourist attack, we should have investigated it as a terrorist attack. That mole has been reassigned to the underground criminal unit."


NEW MANAGEMENT


An unfortunate incident involving a decommissioned AnsaldoBreda train and three litres of vegemite has left the Corporate Unit for Nationalising Trees without a CEO. In the meantime, Ben Dover from Dick & Duck's Foundation has stepped in as a temporary CEO.


Speaking to FilesNews, Mr. Dover told, "We're very excited to be working with these people. Trees are our lifeblood, and we fully intend to branch out with this business."




Last edited by Serio 3 years ago

FileTrekker Super Administrator

I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.

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15th December 2002

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#2 3 years ago

I love you for this.


Danny King | Editor-in-Chief | GameFront.com 



Mikey Super Administrator

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12th June 2008

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#3 3 years ago

This is the best CONTENT yet.


Mikey - GameFront.com - Lead Developer



RadioactiveLobster Site Administrator

Jeff is a missing boss

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28th July 2002

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#4 3 years ago

Good, I needed something to read on the shitter.


If there is no image, Mikey broke something...



Lindæl Advanced Member

Mister Angry Rules Guy

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31st January 2010

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#5 3 years ago

I blame Jeff. The ♍ in his name is very suspicious, and makes him look very suspicious....


filesnation_by_lindale_ff-da1kplo.png



Plokite_Wolf Advanced Member

Resident nutjob

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5th September 2016

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#6 3 years ago

Can you restore the old ones pls?




Mikey Super Administrator

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#7 3 years ago
Posted by Plokite_Wolf Can you restore the old ones pls?

https://www.gamefront.com/search/forums?q=filesnews


Mikey - GameFront.com - Lead Developer



Serio Advanced Member

The Dane

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10th November 2006

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#8 3 years ago
Posted by Plokite_Wolf Can you restore the old ones pls?

I've gone and edited the archive post to have the correct links now. I was too lazy to add Issues #07, #08, and #09, let alone the "Breaking" special issues though.




FileTrekker Super Administrator

I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.

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#9 3 years ago
Posted by Serio
Posted by Plokite_Wolf
Can you restore the old ones pls?
I've gone and edited the archive post to have the correct links now. I was too lazy to add Issues #07, #08, and #09, let alone the "Breaking" special issues though.

Your lazyness has been noted.


Danny King | Editor-in-Chief | GameFront.com