This sorta relates to the how famous are you forum but what you do is rate people's jokes before you by 1-10 a 1 being i don't get it.......10 being lmfao. I'll start with... Sisters of St. Francis A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye....
It reads:SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES
He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought....
Soon he sees another sign that reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 5 MILES
Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION NEXT RIGHT
His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, "What may we do for you my son?"
He answers, " I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business...."
"Very well my son. Please follow me." He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, "Please knock on this door." He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door...
This nun instructs, "Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway."
He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him. The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign: GO IN PEACE. YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS. SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER.
5/10 - funny, but not to funny
which is closer. The Moon Or England?
The moon. your sitting on one.
4/10 Could be better WARNING* We take you now to the Oval Office. *WARNING*
Bush: Condi! Nice to see you! Whats happening? Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China. George: Great. Lay it on me. Condi: Hu is the new leader of China. George: That's what I want to know. Condi: That's what I'm telling you. George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China? Condi: Yes. George: I mean the fellow's name. Condi: Hu. George: The new leader of China. Condi: Hu. George: The Chinaman! Condi: Hu is leading China. George: Now what are you asking me for? Condi: I'm telling you, Hu is leading China. George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China? Condi: That's the man's name. George: That's whose name? Condi: Yes. George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East. Condi: That's correct. George: Then who is in China? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir is in China? Condi: No, sir. George: Then who is? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir? Condi: No, sir. George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone. Condi: Kofi? George: No, thanks. Condi: You want Kofi? George: No. Condi: You don't want Kofi. George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N. Condi: Yes, sir. George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N. Condi: Kofi? George: Milk! Will you please make the call? Condi: And call who? George: Who is the guy at the U.N? Condi: Hu is the guy in China. George: Will you stay out of China?! Condi: Yes, sir. George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N. Condi: Kofi. George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone. (Condi picks up the phone.) Condi: Rice, here. George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?
8/10, pretty funny. WARNING, HIGHLY RACIST CONTENT FOLLOWS! why do white people go to black garage sales? to get thier stuff back.
10/10 thats funny What do you call a bunch of white people running down a hill? Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? Mudslide What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill? Jailbreak What do you call a bunch of white people pushing a car down a hill? Car trouble What do you call a bunch of black people pushing a car down a hill? Payback What do you call a bunch of mexicans pushing a car down a hill? Grand Theft Auto
Avereging all of them togeather, 8/10. What do you call a white man in a suit? on his way to work. what do you call a black man in a suit? Defendant. what do you call a mexican in a suit? GUILTY!!!!!!!!
7/10 HARVARD READING TEST
This was developed as an age test by an R&D department at Harvard University. Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person over 40 years of age can't do it! Good Luck! 1. This is this cat 2. This is is cat 3. This is how cat 4. This is to cat 5. This is keep cat 6. This is an cat 7. This is old cat :sleep: 8. This is fart cat 9. This is busy cat 10. This is for cat 11. This is forty cat 12. This is seconds cat Now go back and read aloud the third word in each line from the top down and I bet you will laugh harder than ever
faugh, thats older then i am. 4/10 Why did the 14 year old mexican girl get pregnant? because her teacher told her to go do an "essay"
10/10 Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"
The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house.
She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Bob has been missing since Friday.
Dr. Professor Logic, PhD.
11th November 2003
Are all the racist jokes really necessary?
The Anxieties - Garage rockin' punk/mad scientist-core for the paranoid and suspicious.