17th June 2002
Presenting Matt Empire Incorporated Dental Surgeries! Located wherever you want to be, these mobile dentists are happy to perform any tooth removal services you may need. Our expert dentists have smashe... uhm, removed many teeth with complicated surgical procedures for many years now. Between them, our trained dentists have over 2,281 years of face-smas... tooth-removing experience. Best of all, it's FREE! That's right, FREE! It's not a government funded organisation, nor is it a charity, our dentists just take sadistic pleasure in removing your teeth without anaesthetic. I'm sorry, did I say without anaesthetic? I meant without anaesthetic. You'll likely be knocked unconscious by the force of the sledgehammer anyway. I'm sorry, did I say sledgehammer? I meant sledgehammer. Call [color=red]0800-SMASHMYFACE-NOW[/color] to book your appointment with your nearest Matt Empire Incorporated Tooth Removal Mobile Surgery Unit. Bone structure of the jaw not guaranteed to survive. Free only applies if you scream in agony; otherwise you have to pay a flat rate of £10.00. Dentists may or may not sexually harass you afterwards; we take no responsibility for this despite encouraging it. We recommend you remove and safely store your eyeballs before the procedure, to prevent permanent blindness and/or death. All rights reserved, please read side of pack for details. As a paralegal organisation, our patents and copyrights are completely irrelevant.
i need to sign up for that. Free dental care those brits think of everyting
Damn, Matt, why didn't you come up with this sooner? Just one question, though: Do I have to pay extra for rusty scissors?
I was kind of hoping there would be pictures of your bloody mouth, buggered with agony. :p Lol, I kid, hope you feel ok, if not, smoke some funny tobacco :smokin:
You want teh pictuRZ? Here. I'll take a shot of my four teeth later
That looks sore from here, so does your mouth, did the dentist/nazi use the rusty scissors or a lawn mower ?
My mouth is merely stained from the blood inside it, and it isn't sore at all. I feel no pain at the moment, and the anaesthetic wore off about 3 hours ago
they planted the dynamite in your gums.
Still no pain whatsoever, and I can eat normally....well, sort of. My jaw still aches a little.