Jotd - 1/16/05 #2... REALLY GOOD 17 replies

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Ironass

Mmm. I touch n0e's Tra La La

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27th January 2003

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#1 13 years ago

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, " My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars ...a lot cheaper than a doctor." So Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart." That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.




Mastershroom VIP Member

Frag Out!

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18th November 2004

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#2 13 years ago

Wow. Pure genius, Ironass!




MaDDoG1221

Matty

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2nd August 2003

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#3 13 years ago

:lol: good one Iron Ass :D




CorT VIP Member

,-'

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2nd April 2003

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#4 13 years ago

brilliant




Ironass

Mmm. I touch n0e's Tra La La

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27th January 2003

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#5 13 years ago

Like the Guiness Beer Commercians...

BRILLIANT




CorT VIP Member

,-'

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2nd April 2003

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#6 13 years ago

IronassLike the Guiness Beer Commercians...

BRILLIANT

yeah, those comercials rock.




Col Jimmy Emeric

Led Zeppelin pwns all

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16th April 2004

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#7 13 years ago

lmao thats great




Ironass

Mmm. I touch n0e's Tra La La

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27th January 2003

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#8 13 years ago

A little black book that you put girls phone numbers in

BRILLIANT




Nusentinsaino

A new sense of nuisance.

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8th December 2003

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#9 13 years ago

wow... that is the best one yet. Good one Ironass! :lol:




AegenemmnoN VIP Member

The cream of the crop

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19th August 2003

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#10 13 years ago

awesome.

i never knew my results would get posted on the internet though..........................




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