Dear STALKER, I know you have a longing for alaska, a very deep one. I also know you live in PA, this gives me an idea how to help you. Using a number of sources and the Homestead Act, I think I can arrange a way to get you there. You'll need a back pack of things you'll need and a mountain bike. First you must gather your precious belongings, and store them in a suitcase, put essentials in the backpack (money, a compas, a knife, a shotgun, some band-aids, a tooth brush, some scizors, bottles of water, and some canned spam). You need to ride your bike to the great salt lakes. I will arrange for a rowboat to be put in a secret location, the location will be revealed to you by a man named Paul Richards, he wears a coon skin hat and a pancho. Row across the lakes. Don't worry about a pasport, Paul will provide you with one. Continue to ride your bike till you get to Great slave lake. Wait for a black haired man wearing a tuxedo and wearing the head of a polar bear on his head. Do not try to find him, he will find you. He will take you into Yukon territory, and leave you in the care of a German wearing a gass mask named Vladimir Kruger, 10 miles from the border. Vlad will escourt you through a series of tunnels underneath the border line. He will take you into the spot chosen where you want to live. Now in return I want 1 thing, an Alienware laptop computer, thats all I want from you. If you accept this compromise I believe you will be in Alaska in about 4 months Your Friend nanobot_swarm
what, you don't know that STALKER wants to live in Alaska?
its not that he's desperate, but this method is a sure fire way to work, and it builds character for when he's gonna live there
I'm moving there in about 4 months anyway (if all goes as planned), but thanks anyway.
BTW, the Homestead Act was discontinued in Alaska in 1986
It was? i thought it was still around well it coulda worked, but whatever *calls Paul, Black hair and Vlad* forget it its off
