Spam Forum revolution: The Pursuit of Funnyness, starring Bob Saget 41 replies

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Queef Richards

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2nd October 2005

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#1 8 years ago

Hello people, sensing the lack of humor in the spam forum, well, not that the spam forum was ever funny, but its gotten to a point in which I am actually angry about the sudden lack of quality in just about everywhere excluding the Cool American Club.

Therefore, I've decided to write a guide on how to be a meaningful piece of shit worthy of being a part of the human race, which will one day go on the conquer the milky way galaxy.

1. HUMOR

This is something all of you lack. No matter what kind of thread, it has to contain humor of some sort. The Spam Forum is a way of life, and is not serious. Serious people are totally uncool. Lay back, untense those muscles, and get a kick out of life.

To be funny, you must confront the humor sense in a non-direct way. For example, this is why Family Guy is unfunny. Seth "I'm the king of comedy" McFarlane knows nothing except singing broadway songs badly and making lame jokes, and therefore Family Guy (also: any other production he makes) is just lame joke after lame joke. This is why people care more about Futurama and other shows that are actually funny more than Family Gay.

Let's see some examples:

UNFUNNY: "Hey lois I decided to took a shit in the car! Annoying laugh!"

FUNNY: "Hey, Lois. I thought it would be a good idea not to rely on our toilet so much as the only place for me to drop a dook. Also, we need a new car."

ALSO FUNNY: "I didn't talk to nobody yesterday! I was in the car taking a shit!"

You see? Instead of throwing the idea of defecating in an automobile onto the viewer, I casually led them into discovering that I have defecated inside my car.

There are a few kinds of humor: random, spontaneous (their different), and many others which are difficult to name since the names don't exist. Such as, a television show that points out the humor in our every day droll life would be well received, but not a show that tries to introduce us into something we don't know about. Why do you think family-oriented sitcoms are so popular and shows like Futurama, although funny too, have not done so well?

Although stupidity is a funny topic, it is starting to grow old and shows like Family Guy and anything made by Seth MacFartlane just exhaust it to the point of which it's not funny. Futurama and Idiocracy is funny because they present the idea of a future we all are familiar with but everyone has degenerated into being idiots who do ridiculous things. That is funny.

How does this apply to your threads? Well, most of the threads in the spam forum are like "I deleted all my Inyri" or "n0e is my secret lover". Yes, hilarious-maybe to loser office workers stuck in a 9 to 5 job redirecting your calls to the customer support of the Colgate toothpaste department making $16 an hour, then coming home to find your wife push you around and your kids take a shit on all your stuff.

One pretty funny thing to make jokes about is risque topics such as: sex rape, minorities, Mexico, the eastern part of the world, crime, teenage girls, etc.

Spontaneism is very good. I have, at one point of my life, been looking through my mail. My report card, paycheck, bills, credit cards, coupons, all of a sudden I see a letter from my friend "HEY DON'T CHECK YOUR POOL" along with a picture of my friend taking a shit in it the night we were all drunk and went skinny dipping. That was humorous because I wasn't expecting it, and yet it did not scare me.

Being completely random is only funny sometimes, like in that show iCarly which I have indeed seen and any show made by the guy who made that, randomness has proved tedious and unfunny.

2. QUALITY

Ok, this section will be much shorter because I'm getting carpal tunnel as I type.

Quality. It goes hand in hand with humor. Quality is not "Lol, I'm in your house :naughty:" (looks at many of you) because frankly that is old and unfunny. Also, there is no topic discussion, so the thread will die quickly and unfortunately be replaced by 20 of the same kind, just like a mexican. See, there's an example of funny right there.

Here are some really useful rules for when you are making a topic.

1. have topic discussion. 2. be original. 3. don't spam this stupid smiley --> :naughty: it's got a purpose 4. pictures we've seen a million times aren't funny anymore.

EDIT: SECOND THOUGHT: THIS ISN'T FACEBOOK DUMBASSES

EDIT: THIRD THOUGHT: EVERYBODY LOL AT THE COUNTDOWN ADS TO STARCRAFT 2. LIKE ANYONE SMART CARES. GET A LIFE.

Hope this guide is useful!

tl;dr: you all suck




Inyri Forge VIP Member

[Insert User Title Here]

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15th March 2005

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#2 8 years ago

Bob Saget has been pursuing funnyness for quite a while...




Lysdestic VIP Member

Dr. Professor Logic, PhD.

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11th November 2003

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#3 8 years ago

God, the grammar in that tutorial is atrocious.

/srshumour




Ryojin

lolwut?

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8th November 2005

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#4 8 years ago

Wife? Kids? I doubt that many of this place's visitors have either.


Disclaimer: Personal opinions still not endorsed by Ryojin.



Schofield VIP Member

om :A

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24th October 2007

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#5 8 years ago

The fuck is this shit? If you want something to be funny, don't make a guide.




Aeroflot

I would die without GF

169,400 XP

2nd May 2003

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#6 8 years ago

Since when did the admins lower the age for forum registration?




redgroupclan

is gay.

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16th August 2008

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#7 8 years ago

[email=noncapstext]R-R-R-R-R-REDGROUPCLAANN![/email]




Andron Taps Forum Mod

Faktrl is Best Pony

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10th September 2007

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#8 8 years ago
Aeroflot;5364867Since when did the admins lower the age for forum registration?

Since Seinfeld, and we all know how much Seinfeld rules.


"I'd shush her zephyr." ~ Zephyr.



Guest

I didn't make it!

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#9 8 years ago

:naughty::naughty::naughty::naughty::naughty:




Ryojin

lolwut?

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8th November 2005

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#10 8 years ago

:facepalm:


Disclaimer: Personal opinions still not endorsed by Ryojin.