That horrible horrible number two... 13 replies

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Badha1rday

Nature's best screw up.

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27th July 2005

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#1 9 years ago

Oh do I have a story to tell you. (I rhymed, lol)

Once upon a time,(today) I went to school. Let's back it up a bit. I figured out in the morning that I had to poo. I figured that I could hold it until the end of the day and go back at my house. I was wrong.

Each class period at my school is forty-one minutes long. During second period, I realised, "Oh shit, I am not going to make it through the day without crapping." My second period class and third period classes are classes I can't miss. I had to wait until my FOURTH PERIOD CLASS to take a dump. Did I mention each class is forty-one minutes?

After an hour and twenty-two minutes of horrible cramping, I finally got to my fourth period class. "May I go to the bathroom", I asked? "Yes you may, my good sir!", my teacher responded. I got up and left to the bathroom. In the bathroom, I look for a stall. I am prepared to go into a stall, but alas, the lock is broken. I am forced to use the handicap stall. Knowing that there are actual handicapped kids in the building I was in, I had to finish fast. Little did I know what I was in for.

In relaxing my anus muscles, I was greeted with a suprise. Nothing was there! I let my guard down. Suddenly, I gushing current of crap and liquids flew out of my sphincter. Farting, splashing, splatting, it was all there. Finally. It stopped.

Only to start up again. The toilet filled with liquids from unknown origin. I must have eaten something that did not agree with my bowels. Fifteen minutes later, it stopped. After cleaning up, I casually pulled up my jeans, washed my hands, and walked out of the bathroom.

So... how did your St. Patrick's Day go?




Day_Man

Go home and get yer shinebox

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28th January 2008

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#2 9 years ago

Who does Number Two work for?




Badha1rday

Nature's best screw up.

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27th July 2005

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#3 9 years ago

Dude, ^^ true story.




SuperSmeg

Renegade Cybertronian

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22nd September 2005

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#4 9 years ago

I can't believe I just read that whole thing.

'Today, I took a dump'.

Best blog ever. Seriously.

(PS: I hope to god that you know I am being sarcastic)




Badha1rday

Nature's best screw up.

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27th July 2005

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#5 9 years ago

Billz1282;4840078I can't believe I just read that whole thing.

'Today, I took a dump'.

Best blog ever. Seriously.

(PS: I hope to god that you know I am being sarcastic)

Best blog ever!? Thanks!11!!!1




Who_Flung_Poo?

No I don't know who did.

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4th November 2003

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#6 9 years ago

BadHairDẵy;4840061

So... how did your St. Patrick's Day go?

Went to work then came home. The End.




Red Menace

SCHOFIELD DID 4/30

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10th August 2004

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#7 9 years ago

Studying for finals and drinking, probably not the best combination. But at least I didn't pinch a grinch.


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Mastershroom VIP Member

Frag Out!

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18th November 2004

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#8 9 years ago
Red Menace;4840085Studying for finals and drinking, probably not the best combination. But at least I didn't pinch a grinch.

Yeah, you try HAVING finals all week, including on St. Paddy's day! I'm struggling to get drunk on green beer, but not hung over for tomorrow's exam!




Badha1rday

Nature's best screw up.

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27th July 2005

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#9 9 years ago
Whoever didn't put their nameNot even the spam forum could save it from failure

lol, failure? The Spam forum was made for this type of random crap not random enough to be on random! :x




rebornintheglory

keyboard warrior

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20th January 2006

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#10 9 years ago

I got sick, and I didn't even get to try any Guinness. Now I am recovering with orange juice and chicken noodle soup.




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