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Spartan VIP Member

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#1 14 years ago

ANNOUNCEMENT FROM MUNICH Here it is - the latest news from Europe. The Burton Group Press Office has received this bulletin fresh from our Munich-based hack.

The European Union Commission has announced their agreement to adopt English as the official preferred language for European community communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiating process, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spelling had some room for mprovement and accepted a five-year phased plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish. (Euro for short). In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft "c". Sertainly, sivil servants will resieve this news with joy. Also, the hard "c" will be replaced with "k". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but typewrires kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced by "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes will be possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of silent "e"s on the language is disgrasful and they would go.

By the fourth year peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" by "z" and "w" by "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from words kontaining "ou", and similsr changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrirun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru.




Guest

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#2 14 years ago

That EU, trying to make everything easier :p




Spartan VIP Member

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#3 14 years ago

It would be pretty hard to adapt to that.




CorT VIP Member

,-'

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#4 14 years ago

[color=red]it kinda sounds like a German accent speaking english at the end if oyu say it out loud :lol:[/color]




Darkness Knight 15

Zerstörung.

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#5 14 years ago

Lol. Thats funny.




iLex

The Russian

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#6 14 years ago

sounds like me speaking during my first year of english lewarnign in US




Jeff Über Admin

I am a mean boss ⬆️⬆️⬇️⬇️⬅️➡️⬅️➡️??

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#7 14 years ago

rofl, I wish this actually wasn´t a joke, would be kewl rofl, and lol German becoming the "EU-language" now that would be a joke!!!


Product Manager | GameFront.com




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#8 14 years ago

Well, it really wouldn't affect me anyway as I live in the US.




DragonNick

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#9 14 years ago

funny how at the beginning they said they chose english over german and they basically ended up with german at the end lol.




Spartan VIP Member

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#10 14 years ago

Yea, it's Genglish.